Sunday, May 31, 2009

We Heart Matthew


Almost every Sunday after Church we go to the Lost Cat and Dog Adoption event at Pet Smart. Today we fell in love with the sweetest dog named Matthew. He is 6 months old (same age as Snickers when Linda rescued him) and he is a Shepard mix (just like Snickers.) He was a little shy and hesitant (just like Snicks.) Linda wanted to adopt him soooo bad. She was teary eyed on the way home because her mind won out over her heart. He was $295 to adopt, plus you have to add on the vet bill to make sure he is healthy. At 6 months, Matthew was already almost 50 pounds. The rescue people said he was going to be gigantic when he was fully grown. That's what we want, but that means he would eat a lot of food too! Oh.... maybe we should just go back and get him. Isn't he so handsome?

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Sci-Fi Movie of the Week


Jerry is leaving for the UK in a few days. I'm kind of excited because when Jerry travels, it means I get great souvenir prizes! Of course I'll miss him, but I only see him once a week anyway, so it won't be too bad. That is if he survives the PLAGUE OF KILLER CATERPILLARS spreading across Britain! The brown tail moth caterpillars have up to two million hairs each. The hairs break off and get in the air causing horrible allergic reactions which are sparking major health alerts. It all sounds like a movie from Sci-Fi, but it's true. I bet Jerry will be inspired to create a new comic book about the attack of the killer caterpillars while he is there. Oh wait, he already wrote the book: The Mothman.


We Offer You a Pizza You Can't Refuse


A friend of Linda's from her church has a pizza parlor named Don Corleone's. It is even decorated like an old-school mafia hangout with posters on the wall. Their old black delivery car has a plastic hand hanging out of the trunk and a machine-gun toting "boss" painted on the side of the car. The owner, Waleed is actually a wonderful Christian family man who has nothing at all to do with the Mafia. Not so for the owner of Goomba's Pizzeria in Dayton Beach. When 2 men complained about their calzone order, the owner pistol whipped the two men. Police later found out that the owner is actually a former mob hit man. Just to be on the safe side, if Don Corleone offers me a free pizza, I'm taking it! (Why in the world would someone want a Rolex watch with a pizza logo on it? Must be a status symbol in the pizza making business. Linda is going to check Waleed's wrist next time she sees him.)

Fear Not....


When Tierney was little, she was afraid of Zombies. I'm not even sure where she heard about them or why she was scared. She was also afraid of aliens landing in the front yard and coming in her bedroom window. She would line her sill with toys that would make noise when they fell over so she could be prepared to run to Linda's room. Add to that list clowns and I think the Pillsbury Dough Boy and the Michlein Man too. All of these weird fears might explain the quirky girl Tier is today. It's a good thing she wasn't in Seattle this week when they had a Horror convention. The fan-boys dressed up like zombies and roamed the streets. One man had a costume so realistic that it got him arrested. Someone called the police and a dozen cop cars arrived and ran up to the man with their guns drawn. Ooops! They realized he was just a costume zombie only dressed up for the conventions Resident Evil Zombie party. You think the organizers should have warned the city they were having a dress like a Zombie contest since there were dozens of guys stumbling around with their guts and eyeballs hanging out? (I agree, the Michlein Man is scary!)

Friday, May 29, 2009

Finger Lickin' Funny


Yeah! Two pants-stuffing food shoplifting stories in one week! Impossible, but true. This time the food stuffed into the pants were chicken strips! Two 16-year old boys were arrested at a Walmart in Ga. for shoving 2 BUCKETS of chicken strips into their pants and walking out without paying. I wonder what clued the security guards who stopped them in the parking lot that something was amiss? They might be wearing these KFC pj's in jail!

They may melt in your mouth....


But what happens once you swallow? There are friends of Linda who drive 25 miles to get hot Krispy Kreme doughnuts. One time Jerry bought home Krispy Kreames and ate 6 in one day. I wonder what that did to his internal plumbing? Now we know. A Krispy Kreme shop in No. Va. is being blamed for clogging the county sewer system. All the highly corrosive waste, grease, yeast and other toxins caused $1.9 million dollars in damages to the sewer! The company says it is not true and refuse to pay the repair bill. The damaged sewers clogged the pipes which resulted in raw sewage leaks that shut down part of the cities sewer system. City workers actually ran a closed-circuit camera inside the pipes to help their case but the camera got stuck in the goo. On the plus side, I absolutely LOVE these flip-flops. Supposedly (the source is not confirmed), they were giving away in London as a promotion to helped stress workers get back to nature. Regardless of their location, harried workers can feel like they have a grassy park under their feet! The flips take 3 weeks to grow and each shoe is covered with 5,000 blades of grass. If Linda had these shoes I would use them in a pinch of I could not get outside to do my business!

Chiquita Went Bananas!!


Pumas or cougars are big cats that prowl the woods and mountains. The boy cougars can range between 5-9 feet tail to toe and weigh between 115-160 pounds. In rare cases, males can tip the scales at 260 pounds. Chiquita the Chihuahua did not let the size scare him when his best friend Rosie (a border terrier) was being pinned down by a cougar who wandered into their yard. The two dogs live in a small town in Oregon where their yard backs up to a wooded area. Both dogs were playing when the cat wandered down and decided Rosie looked a tasty morsel . Rosie was about to become lunch! Chiquita went ballistic and saved the life of Rosie by acting like a rottweiler. The cougar turned tail and ran back to the woods. Rosie is fine and Chiquita is my new hero.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Even Jeopardy has Banned Bible Categories


Yesterday I wrote about a lady who could not display an American flag in her office because someone was offended. Today I read about a pastor in San Diego who is threatened with escalating fines in he continues to hold bible studies in his home. Officials sent them a letter saying inviting 15 people to their house was an "unlawful use of land" and told them to "stop religious assembly." It the pastor wants to keep having folks over for a bible study, he would need to apply for a permit which costs tens of thousands of dollars. What about guys who meet in their home to play poker for money? What about people who meet in their home to sell make-up? Lots of people gather at homes to watch football games on a weekly basis. What is happening to our country? These are just the highlights from the story. You can read it yourself on http://www.10news.com, the San Diego television web site.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Read all the way to the bottom


By accident on purpose I googled "man calls 911 over..... " OK...ready: Man calls 911 over not getting the juice box in his MickyD's happy meal. His little brother was pitching a fit because it was not in the bag. A man called 911 because Burger King was out of lemonade. Another man called 911 because his 28 year old son's room was a mess. (I already blogged about that story.) A patron at Subway called 911 twice because his sub was not made like he ordered. A women called 911 three times to complain that McDonalds cheated her out of some chikin' nuggets. One women called 911 because she saw 2 men kissing in a parking lot. One women called called 911 to get a cute cops phone number. (Good idea!) You just gotta call 911 when there are not enough shrimp in your friend rice, right? One women thought so. True... a women in Orlando called 911 to say she was locked inside her car because her battery was dead and the electric locks did not work The dispatcher told her to pull up the lock by hand. (No word on the color of her hair.) One 4-year old called 911 for help with his homework. When Taylor was 5 he called 911 too just playing with the phone. The police came to our house and looked through to see if Linda was holding him prisoner. I love the one where the man called 911 because he could not get his 6' boa constrictor back in his cage after giving him a bath. Linda had a 4 foot boa and it got out of the cage. She almost called 911 because Rocky the snake was just about to eat their kitten. A dog even called 911 to save his human who was having a seizure. The moral of the story, the dog was the only one who actually used 911 for the right reason!

We have feelings too!


Scientist are very busy discovering new things. Some of them devote their entire lives to important things like space exploration, developing new more efficient fuels and studying to see if dogs have morals. There is a new book by an important scientist that explains how mammal's brains are hardwired with morals similar to humans. Mammal's can senses fairness, help other animals in need and show empathy. I already knew all this was true. Every time Linda is sad, I always lick her tears away and do little tricks to make her laugh. Snickers was the king of empathy. When Sheba did something bad (which was pretty often) and got in trouble, he would always act so sad she was being punished. Snickers also saved me so many times from Chip attacks, even when it caused him pain because it hurt him so much to get up. He never ate my food, even if he was hungry, because he knew I would want to eat it later. I'm not sure if the study is right about cats through. I've never seen Chip show an ounce of compassion or fairness.

Now I'm Mad


Last I checked, the country I live in is called America. And the last I checked we have an American red, white and blue flag. This past Monday was Memorial Day. Lot's of people fly the American flag to honor those who currently serve and those who gave their lives for this country. There are parades to honor these men and women. In Texas, there is a mom who has daughter currently serving in Iraq and her husband and sons are former military men. She put a flag up in her office this Memorial day. She shares the large office with 3 other people. The next day she was told to take it down because one of her office mates found her flag offensive. The person who took the flag down (and laid it on the floor) has been in the US for 14 years, but came here from another country. Yikes! People already can't read their bibles at their own desks during their lunch breaks because people get offended just seeing the bible. Now you can't display the American Flag because they get offended. What's next? Some neighbor might complain that they think Chihuahuas are ugly and then the dog catcher man will come and take me away?

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Hi Nurses!


It's a good thing Sarah works for a head doctor. (Not the shrinking-head doctor, but the kind who deals with broken brains.) The vet told me I'm probably having epileptic seizures! So far, I've only had 6 in three years. The veterinarian said if they become more frequent, I'll have to take some dangerous medicine called phenobarbital. If there is a real emergency, I can always call Sarah to get me an appointment with the neurologist she works for. (Plenty of people Dr.'s have helped pets in the past and Carol said this Doctor is the nicest and caring Dr. ever!) In fact, some of the nurses there even read my blog.

Another Dog Saves the Day


This time an American bulldog named Brittney is the guardian angel. The 9-year old pooch was diagnosed with several cancerous tumors. Instead of putting Brittney down, her owner Scott is giving her medication to help her ease the pain until she goes to dog heaven. This past Saturday, Brittney woke up Scott when she smelled smoke. A fire was burning the house down. Both Scott and Brittney made it out of the house safe and sound. Way to go Big Brittney! When the time comes, there will be a special place for you in dog heaven.... next to my big boy Snickers and Sheba in the best field with the tallest trees and the sweetest treats.

UPDATE: Brittney went to dog heaven yesterday. RIP Brittney.

Big Mama's House


One of my favorite topics are men who shoplift by sticking seafood down their pants. You may think that it would be a rare occurrence, but it is actually quite a popular crime. Now, for the first time, I'm proud to report a female was arrested for shoving food down her pants. This time a 20-year old Florida women was in a 7-11 when the cashier noticed a big bulge in the front of her pants. The bright clerk, realizing the bulge was unnatural, called the cops. Cops found a 2.4 ounce Big Mama pickled sausage wrapper inside her car. The girl already ate the evidence. The cops also found drug stuff, so she was hauled off to the Big House...all because of a $1.19 hunk of sausage.

No Silencing the Lambs


Lambs are really smart. They have figured out if they burp enough, people will stop eating them. They can go back to lazing in the field or following Mary to school. Scientist have figured out the sheep burp... a lot. So much so that all that burping is posing a serious threat to the environment. Seems those smart sheep burp up methane or "greenhouse gas", way more than cows or pigs. Officials are urging people to stop eating lamb to save the earth. Live long little lambs, keep burping strong!

Monday, May 25, 2009

Calendar Girl (Maybe!)


Hey, I need your votes!! I entered to be featured on a Chorkie calendar. I am contestant number 5. I used a picture when I was just a baby, yawning because I was so tired. I so hope I get chosen. Please go the the web site and vote for me 1 zillion times: www.ccchihuahuas.com. Thanks for choosing Choopie. I will do my best to be the very best calendar girl ever. Maybe I'll be chosen for the cover!!

The Latest Poop


I have been doing so much better with using the pee-pee pad and going outside to do my business. I will have to admit, when Linda is not home, there are times when I don't use the proper place. You see, Chip terrorizes me for the fun of it. If I'm in the bedroom and can't get down the hallway because it is guarded by the bad cat, I have had one or two accidents. (OK, 4 or 15.) Linda found a few Ooops'ies under her bed. She was NOT happy. Now I'm in BIG trouble. New rule: I can't lay on Linda's bed while she is at work. All the doors will be shut from now on. Where will I hide if Chip gets crazy on me?

Seal of Approval


I love to bark at the door bell. It does not matter if it is the real door bell, or just a door bell ringing on TV, I still bark my little head off. I also bark with even more intensity when Linda says "Do you want me to get my shoes on?" All that barking is free, you don't have to pay once cent to listen to it. Why then, are officials in San Diego spending $700,000 a year to scare seals off the beach by using barking dog sounds? Don't seals bark to each other? The seals are taking over the popular beach so people can't swim. If the barking dogs don't work, they will spray the seals with water. Don't seals like water? How would that scare them away? They should just post a sign that says "No Seals on Beach". That's what they do for dogs. "No Dogs on Beach." They expect dogs to understand the signs, why not seals? Linda can record my barking and use it to scare away all the birds taking over our back yard. I can't play out there anymore because they dive bomb me when I romp and run.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Toilet Horrors


Every once in awhile I read about a new invention or gadget and add it to my blog. Most of the time they benefit pets, but this one is for humans. I wanted to include it because it is such a good idea. In Japan, a new horror novella called Drop has taken the country by storm. The story is set in a public restroom. (True: Many Japanese parents would tell their kids that a big hairy hand would come out and pull the kiddies into the toilet if they were not good. Does not seem like a good way to potty train your toddler!) Each "book" is printed totally on a roll of toilet paper and costs 210 yen, or $2.20 American dollars. I love this ghost that the little boy made out of toilet paper. He just took a balloon, string and some TP to make his scary mobile.

Chip with a Choopie for a Brain....


I am so bummed. Today was supposed to be a big fun adventure for Linda and I. She still says I am not acting 100% normal, so we could not go. True, I did throw-up a little juicy stuff last night. And true, the heat really bothers me. Also true, the festival would have thousands and thousands of people. Until I get my vet check-up, Linda is keeping me quite and relaxed. Jerry is in at an art exhibit selling monkey faeries, monkeys with a lizard for a brain (see right) and frogs with tongues as long as a ruler. We wanted to go and support him, but he totally understood that it would not be best for me to go, or even for Linda to be gone from home that long. Now it is very cloudy and looks like it is going to pour any minute. I hope he is inside! (Leave me a comment if you would like his gallery web address.) I want his next drawing to be a cat with a dog for a brain since that makes more sense than a monkey with a lizard for a brain.

I want one!



During one of our walks, a guy stopped us to talk to Linda about what kind of dog I was. They talked for a long time about Chorkies and Meagles. He has a Beagle and a Mini Pincher. When they have babies they are called Meagles. Last fall, his dogs had a litter of 7 pups. Each puppy sold for around $800! (That's even more then I cost.) The guy liked me so much that he gave Linda his business card and told us that we can have first pick of the next litter of pups.... for free! The mans main goal is for all the puppies to go to homes where people will love and take great care of them. The puppies are cute. I especially love that they can master cats. Just look how this cat is tamed by the baby pooches. Chip won't be bossing me around if we get a Meagle. I think they look just like a miniature Snickers dog!

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Aloha!


Now that summer is officially here, I need to start thinking about my summer wardrobe. I'm sure there will be plenty of parties to go to. Linda was invited to a summer solstice pool party. I would be the hit of the picnic if I wore this adorable bikini and grass skirt combo. I even can stand up and dance just like the model. Pass me the sun screen and a Pina Colada please!

Tidy Bowl


Who ever thought that a dogs water bowl could cause a house fire that resulted in $215,000 dollars in damages? A dog was minding his own business chilling on the deck while his humans were not at home. The sunlight hitting the glass water bowl caused a magnifying glass effect which started a fire on the deck. The Seattle house caught on fire, but neighbors saw the flames and rescued the dog in time. When Snickers was outside, he had a special water bowl but it was not glass. It was ceramic with little dog bones decorating the outside. Aw, I still miss the big boy. I want this water bowl. Who doesn't enjoy drinking from the toilet bowl? (Well, I think I would like it. I'm just about 18" too short to reach the rim.)

No, it's mine!

Add Image
I feel fine after my "stroke attack" last night. Just to be on the safe side, Jerry came and stayed with me while Linda was teaching today. I was peeved he would not take me for a walk or play ruff with me. That's what Jerry is good for, not sitting around making me rest. He always encourages me to play hard and pretend I'm a big scary dog. We usually wrestle and play tug of war with the toys. Today he acted like a little old man and just sat on the couch. He kept saying it was for my own good and until I see the Vet, I've got to take it easy and not overheat or breath too hard. There goes my weekend plans of going to the festival and seeing the sights :-( frownies.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Save the Devil?


The Australian Tasmanian devil has been official put on the endangered species list. Since 1996, the population has declined by 70% due to devil facial tumor disease. The Australian government has promised to spend almost 8 million dollars over the next 5 years to save the devil. The photo was so horrible of the Tasmanian devil with a facial tumor, I decided to use this photo of the Ninja Devil Duckie instead.

Call Whine-One-One


We almost had a dire emergency tonight. In my earlier post today, I said how careful I had to be playing outside in the hot weather. Sure enough, a few hours ago I had another seizure. This one was longer and more severe then I've had in the past. The entire side of my body goes into stroke like symptoms, my head falls over and I can't stand. Then I shake and quiver. It made Linda crazy with worry. She called the vet, but it was closed. She called Jerry, he did not answer the phone. Finally, she called the emergency 24 hour clinic. Jerry got the crying-hysterical message and came over in less then 5 minutes. Things settled down and I was feeling better. They watched me for a few hours and decided I was going to live. I do have to go to the Vet next week to be totally checked out. In Cheyenne, Wyo. a man saved his dogs live by sucking rattlesnake venom from a bite on his dogs nose. The dogs head swelled up to 3x the normal size. The man & dog had to have very expensive anti-venom shots and lived to tell the tale. The only side effect from tonight's fiasco was 3 more gray hairs on Linda's head.

Bye Tier!


Tierney, Taylor and Sarah left for vacation today. They are spending the first weekend at Bush Gardens and Williamsburg. Then, Tier will continue with Katie (the blond) down to Myrtle Beach. Linda warned them to watch out for sharks and Katie said they are shark charmers. Both girls are so pretty, they could probably charm sharks, crabs, whales and all the sea creatures! Tierney promised to send a photo each day to post, but don't hold your breath waiting to see them. She'll forget all about it once she starts having fun.

Friday Fun


We just finished cleaning and Linda promised to take me to the dog park as soon as it cools off a little bit. Even though I am little, I overheat really easily. Other dogs run around, jump and play with no side effects. I get doggie-asthma and do little backward coughs. I also have had two mini-seizures from running in the heat. I have to be careful to take it easy. It's hard for me to go slow because I want to race every where I go. Last night I had a little tizzy-fit while Jerry was throwing my toy. I had to stop and settle down. Maybe I'll outgrow it, think? This isn't me playing with the teddy bear, but I thought he was adorable.

P.S. Whew! The dog park was fun but it was still too hot for me. Of course I was the smallest dog there. The next biggest was a 9 pound Morkie (Maltese and Yorkie.) Some of the dogs are a little rude. When I tried to get water from one of the 4 bowls around the tree, they would run over and push me out of the way so I could not get a drink. Linda did not intervene to shoo the other dogs away. She explained I had to be assertive and get my face in the bowl too! It worked! They eventually let me get a turn.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Nothing is really ever "free"


The girls just got home from hanging-out at Glory Days Bar and Grill. After 9 p.m., all appetizers are 1/2 price. What a deal. Not for me though. Of course, like always, I could not go because "dogs are not allowed." That pretty much sums up my life unless it's the dog park, a walk or a trip to PetSmart. They should take me more places because I am so cute that people would give us free things. Not that Tier and Linda need any help though. Everywhere Tierney goes... from 7-11 to Uno's to Cheese Cake Factory to Glory Day's, she get free food. Tonight, she smiled at one of the boy waiters carrying an ice cream sundae to another table. Next thing we know...poof! A sundae appears at our table (along with the boys phone number which Tier ripped up. Everyone has a motive, nothing is really free.) Just think of the free swag we would get if we all went out to eat together. Tierney looks 12 in this photo. The funny thing is that when she was 12 she looked 22. Now that she is 22, she looks 12!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Check out my sexy legs!


Prom season is in full swing. Girls are shopping for new dresses, getting their hair done and spending all their parents money. Now that Tierney and Taylor are all grown, Linda has no more proms to get ready for. I guess she forgot about me! The Humane Society does an annual Black-tie ball for dogs and their owners. I really want to go! What do you think of my dress? (Of course it might be a wee-bit tight since the last time I put it on was 3 years ago. I guess it will be Slim Fast for a few days: a shake for breakfast, a shake for lunch and a sensible dinner. I saw it on TV.) Maybe I can get Bo to be my date!

3 More Days til Friday!


Tierney is starting to turn Friday into "cleaning day" too. I know that when Linda gets home from teaching on Friday afternoon, out comes the mop, vacuum, and cleaning rags. Over the last few months, she has also come home to Tier cleaning her room. At one time her room was a 911 disaster. It used to make Linda nuts, but she learned to close the door and let it be. A Dad in Ohio literally called 911 over his adult sons messy room. When the Dad told his son to clean his disaster of a room, the son threw a plate of food at his Pop. That was the plate that broke the camels back. Dad called 911 and reported the messy room. The son repented and realized that it he is lucky to be living rent free in his parents basement and agreed to keep his room clean.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Up, Up and Away


Linda's friend Leslie took her new puppy to a matinee movie last Tuesday. The dog is the same exact size as I am, just about 4 pounds. The wiener dog just laid in his bag and slept during the whole movie. I want to go see the new Pixar movie coming out called "Up". It has everything a movie should have: talking dogs, a boy scout, and a flying house powered by balloons. Of course popcorn is one of my 5 favorite foods, so that is a must!

Just Watch the Trailer.. Now...

Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus

E-I-E-I-(MO)O


I'm not allowed to walk in the street. When we get to the curb, it's "carry" time. This is for my safety. A driver could easily confuse me with a squirrel since we are the same size. In New Jersey, someone did not tell the cows about street safety. More then a dozen cows escaped from a farm and wandered out into a heavily traveled highway. Traffic came to a complete standstill while the (dumb) cows mooed and mingled. Police corralled the cows into a nearby parking lot. Luckily no cows were squished by a passing semi. (It was hard to find a picture of cows in the highway, so I chose this funny artist instead. Look at his website if you like sketches of cow drawings. Ha-Ha...sausages! Very funny!)

Riding a Toilet?


Linda had a horrible nightmare last night. In her dream she was at the corner shopping center about 1 1/2 miles from our house. She was in a restaurant eating when a tornado started inside the building. There wasn't any wind, things just started swirling and swirling. Tables, chairs and people got sucked into the vortex. She ran out into the parking lot and started running home. Things got worse when a no-water tsunami started. She was fighting the traffic (riding a toilet bowl because someone stole her car) to get back to me when a neighbor stopped her and told her it was too late. An old women was trying to feed me vegetables so the neighbor gave me to a passing Chinese women. Linda started freaking out! When Linda woke up, she held tight and would not let me go. A women outside of Los Angles had a waking nightmare when a 4.7 earthquake hit her home last night. Her puppy had never experienced a earthquake and started going nuts. Some people were watching "Angles and Demons" in a Redondo Beach theater when the ceiling started falling on them. The quake was felt all the way to San Diego. Some people thought it was the BIG earthquake that is predicted to hit the West coast soon. I'm glad we live in a place where there are not tsunamis; earthquakes or tornadoes. Just dangerous cats named Chip who attack me when I'm home alone.

Here Kitty-Kitty


Police are our protectors whose job it is to keep us safe from bad guys, crazy drivers and dangerous situations. One of those dangerous situations could be capturing and subduing a big stuffed animal. True. Some guy called 911 to report a 150 pound cougar inside a drain pipe. Police came armed with all sorts of cougar catching tools, including a zapper gun. Police peeked down the pipe with a flash light and sure enough, the glassy green eyes shone in the beam. They zapped the creature so they could put it in a cage. The ten police officers must have been embarrassed when they pulled out a big stuffed toy cat. Here I am subduing my very own black panther. This is the only cat in the house that obeys me.

The Birds....part 2


We figured out why the robin birds are hating lil' Choop. Today when Linda let me out to sun on the deck, the big boy robin once again sat on the railing scolding me for just lying still. We went down the stairs to investigate, and sure enough... there is a nest right under the deck boards. So when I walk on the deck, my body is inches from the nest right under me. If you look through the cracks, you can see the nest. The broken winged bird is not in our backyard anymore. I swear I did not do it. He was injured when I got to him. Now I have to be super careful that a bird does not poke my eyes out.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Beam me up, Choopie!


Linda went to this cool place called the Air and Space Museum to see Star Trek at the Imax theater. It's no place for dogs, that's for sure. The screen and sound are so intense that it would scare the fur off me! Everyone said it is a good movie. I'll have to wait and watch it on DVD. Jerry took this photo on his space-age iPhone. Then he beamed it to her gmail account. All very Star Trekie.

It Will be OK Big Guy



Gibson is a harlequin Great Dane. He holds the title of the World's Tallest Dog. He loves his owner and even sleeps snuggled up with her in bed! I sleep on Linda all night too. The difference is that I am 6 inches and 4 1/2 pounds. Gibson is 42.2 inches and 170 pounds! When he stands on his hind legs, he is more then 7 feet tall. When I stand on my hind legs, I am halfway to Linda's knee. He is a certified therapy dog who visits cancer patients, burn victims and veterans. I do that too, only I just stay inside my house. Every time Linda or Tierney get sick, I'm right there to help them feel better. Gibson has been on every TV show and in every newspaper. He even has his own Blog (which is nowhere near as good as mine, truth!) Now Gibson is home recovering from having his leg removed. He has bone cancer and has to have chemotherapy. Dr.'s say he'll have a full recovery. (The little dog in the picture is 4" tall, 2" shorter then me.)

There is Something Fishy About this Story


Linda does not eat any fish because it is yucky. All those slimy scales and sharp fins. The stinky creatures have bugged out eyes and swim in polluted water. Plus, she hates that the poor fish think they are getting a cookie and it turns out to be attached to a large barbed hook that gets caught in their lip. Ouch! Tierney said it is OK, because fish only have a 3 second memory and they forget that it even hurt once they get thrown back in the water. Tier does eat fish when she is out at a restaurant. She better be careful because an NBC investigation team discovered that 85% of area restaurants do a switch-a-roo with the fish on their menu. You may think you are ordering an expensive slab of fish flesh, but they substitute a cheaper fish and don't tell you. Even the restaurant "Red Snapper" was not serving Snapper. They only pretended it was Snapper and diners can't tell the difference. Now I wonder if the Sirloin Steak in my dog food is really steak. It's probably ground-up road kill! Pass the veggies, please.

The Birds


I almost got killed today by diving birds in my backyard. There was a smallish bird fluttering around in the grass. It did not fly away when I got close. All off a sudden, 4 or 5 birds came swooping down screeching at me. I was nuzzling the poor hurt birdie before Linda was able to get to me. Luckily, none of the birds pecked my eyes out! Then, my play date got canceled because Bo's Dad had to spend the night in the ER from an allergic reaction. I hope he is OK. Instead, Linda took me to the Lil' Dog Park. Today there was 8 other small pooch's. I hate to keep blowing my own horn, but I was by far the cutest dog there. Everyone said so, even the owner of the second cutest dog that was a white poofy Maltese. I ran and played for almost one hour. Now I'm crashed on the bed.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Friday Update


Tonight is Tierney's graduation party at her Dad's. I won't be going, but we are going to have another party here for her. Tier and Linda are going to work on getting the deck in shape and try to find some inexpensive patio furniture on Craig's list. Anyone have any for sale at a good price? Speaking of the deck, today I spent a few hours laying on the deck while Linda cleaned the house. I am getting braver and now stay outside by myself. Linda blocked the steps off the deck so I don't go in the yard. Speaking of cleaning, Tier totally cleaned her room today, it looks amazing. Speaking of amazing, there is a show on TV right now about a hippo who lives with humans in the house. She got swept away from her parents in the river when she was a baby. A game ranger in Africa adopted her 1 year ago. Now the 9-year old hippo is almost one ton. I don't have time to type all the food she eats. Since they are on a game preserve, Jessica leaves the house and goes to live with the wild hippos, then comes in later and lays on the floor and watches TV with her humans. I guess it's kind of like when Chip comes in and plops on the floor! Too funny!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

The Tassel is Worth the Hassel


Congratulations Tierney! She is now officially graduated from collage. Tier was one of 6 students who received an Honors medal. The school told her they are going to keep her thesis on file for future students to reference because it was so good. Yeah!! Linda and I covered the front door with a big congratulations sign before she got home last night. For her present, we got her a slew of clothes from JCrew to wear at her new job (when she gets one.) I would like her to stay home full-time with me and be my Nanny. She could walk me every 2 hours, play with me 10 minutes out of every hour, feed me every 4 hours, pet and scratch me all the rest of the time while I sleep, and keep me free from cat attacks. Besides, the pay is incredible. Lots of puppy licks and snuggles with pure adoration and unconditional love.

Yeah! Says the Cow


I can't remember if I lived here when Licorice was alive. He was a wonderful cat. Linda called him "Licky" because he would lick your hand when he wanted to be scratched. He was also a cuddly lap cat and much more laid back then Chip is. He got a big tumor and died. Chip loved, loved, loved vegetables. He would eat mostly veggies, and a little meat. We did some research and there are a lot of pure veggie cats. His favorite food was veggie pizza. Lick would not touch the sausage or pepperoni. A Belgian city is the first city ever to go vegetarian at least once a week. Civil servants and politicians will be the first to start the trend. Livestock is responsible for 1/5 of green house gas emissions, which impact the environment. It will also help with the obesity problem. The cool part is that the town is making "veggie street maps" to help people find restaurants that cater to vegetarians. Linda wants to start this trend in our town. I don't mind as long as we don't have to be vegans. I want to eat cheese and eggs. Chip will hate it. Oh well, she needs to lose a few pounds anyway.

Sounds like a Sci-Fi Movie


Tierney knows all about how to survive a zombie attack. She read a book and even did a talk show about key points on what works and does not work. I'm glad she lives here to keep us safe in the event of an attack. Now scientists in Texas have developed a way to turn fire ants into zombies. A parasitic fly lands on them and turns the ant into a zombie whose heads fall off. Here is how it works. The flies lay eggs on the fire ants and the eggs hatch into maggots inside the ant. The maggot eats the fire ants brain then whoops, the ants head falls off. This is where it gets creepy. When there is no brain left in the ant, the ant just starts wandering around like a zombie. In a month, the ant's head falls off. I'm freaking out over this. What happens when these flies mutate and start attacking bigger creatures? First mice, then squirrels and finally, Chorkies. I don't want to be a Zombie. That does explain why Chip acts like she does. She must be in the process of having the maggots eat her brain because she is constantly wandering around aimlessly. Yikes, I hope I'm not the one who finds her head on the floor.



Tuesday, May 12, 2009

If You Can't Run With The Big Dogs....


....Ask the Big Dog to run with you! Today Linda and Tierney took me to the dog park in our town. There were a bunch of Big Dogs on the Big Dog side and exactly zero dogs on the Little Dogs side. I ran and explored awhile, but I kept sticking my nose through the wire fence to kiss and smell the other dogs. Linda said I would have been trampled if I went over. All of a sudden a man with a big Rhodesian Ridge Back dog came up to the entrance. These dogs were originally breed to hunt lions in Africa. For some reason, Linda asked the man if he could put the dog on my side for awhile. Rhodie was so gentle and kind to me! We ran and played a little, but he wanted to go run with the big dogs. This weekend I am going to an outdoor art show. There will be lots of little dogs there to play with.

"Can You Say Ouch?"










Urban Legends are always fun to read about. There is the one about the very large cat. Look left. False. There is the one about the dog named Hercules. See above. False. Then people said Mr. Rogers of "Can you say sniper?" had a former secret career as a trained assassin. See above. (In the green sweater, not black fur.) False. How about the one where the man sat down on the toilet and a snake came up and bit his privates? (No photo of this one.) True. That's right, True. A Taiwanese man sat down on the toilet and immediately felt an excruciating pain on his boy bits. He jumped up and found a big snake was dangling from his plumbing. The 51-year old man is under medical care to make sure he does not get an infection. The local TV station showed workers uncoiling the big yellow and black rat snake from the man's toilet.