Wednesday, June 30, 2010


People were sleeping in the movie theater parking lots waiting to be first in line for the opening of a movie about some vampires, werewolves and a blond girl who can't decide who she loves. I don't know what the fuss is all about. The only thing I would wait in line for is chicken.

Arf! Yelp! Bark! Woof!

I'm not a dog that barks insistently. I do bark if someone comes to the door, but if people or dogs use the sidewalk in front of my house, I pay it no notice. For some reason, the German Shepard across the street and the white foo-foo fluffy dog behind our house are both barking non-stop today. I could not even enjoy my backyard time this morning because the crazy dog was making me a nervous wreck. It's a good thing Linda does not have a little baby trying to sleep because she would be knocking on some doors telling the owners to train their dogs to zip it.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Cool Off

Even though it is cooler out tonight, Linda said I can't go for a walk since she is not sure if I am totally recovered from the earlier seizure. Total bummer. I understand her concern for me and even appreciate it.... but I just want to be a regular dog and take walks in the rain, snow, heat or sleet. OK, maybe not the rain, snow or sleet, but definitely the heat. I want my own pool to cool off. (Hear that Jerry?)

I Know...

Don't hate me because I'm beautiful!

Dog Days of Summer

It's been two whole days without a walk because of the incredible heat wave and then the storms. Since Linda was off this morning, she decided to take me for a walk while it was still only in the mid 80's. Bad idea. After going just 4 houses, I had a very intense seizure. This is the first one in a very long time. We were hoping I was healed and that the seizures were a thing of the past. It lasted all the way home (Linda has to carry me on my back like a baby to protect me) and then for about 3 minutes longer after she put me on her bed. Linda just kept calm and prayed that I will be OK. It takes me about 10 minutes to feel myself after it has passed. When she was sure I was going to be fine, she took me off the big bed and let me walk around. It looks like I won't be getting a walk anytime in the near future. Maybe September?? Meanwhile, how about some ice cream to cool off.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Watch Out Below

What an incredible thunder storm we had this afternoon. It was raining cats and dogs! The thunder was so loud I hid my head in Linda's elbow. It only lasted an hour, but to me it felt like 4 days. Our flowers out front seemed to double in size during the storm. When Linda left for her classes, the sun was shining and it was 100 degrees! Once again, it is too hot for our walk. She is leaving in a few minutes to go to the movies with friends to see the Karate Kid. I hope she does not get so into the movie she does a flying side kick down the aisle! Oh wait, she can't because of her broken toe.
P.S. Linda said the Karate Kid was pretty good. Not enough Jackie Chan fighting for her though.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Baby It's Hot Outside!

It is still very hot outside, even though it is 9:30 at night. Linda did not take me for a walk earlier either because she was afraid I would have a seizure. Tonight she just put a lawn chair in the backyard while I walked around to take care of business. There are dangerous critters in our yard at night, so she wanted to be right down near me if anything attacked me. After her morning church service, she met some friends in Ashburn and did not get home until much later than normal. Then she left early because she had baby duty in the nursery. It was a good day to catch up on my sleep from a very busy Saturday. Oh, and her broken toe is now purple. She cut a big hole in the side of an old pair of sneakers so the broken toe could stick out. It should be interesting to find out how she does teaching her 4 classes tomorrow!

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Nom Nom Nom

Linda got home just in time tonight to watch SyFy's "Dino vrs Super Croc"! There has already been a whole bunch of people eaten up and it's only been 8 minutes. SyFy has the absolute best movies ever! Maybe she'll pop some popcorn in the microwave.

Hold the Lettuce

This looks so yummy, I want Linda to take me to Friendly's for dinner tonight. They have outside seating, so we can get it to go and sit on the picnic tables. It is a burger between two grilled cheese sandwiches! OMG! How could it get any more delicious? It's probably a billion calories, so I'm sure it is not on my diet. Besides, it weighs more than I do.


Linda came home from sparring class today limping. Usually she is limping because her knee swells. Not today. She was sparring a new person in class. Since they did not have padded sparring boots, Linda did not wear hers. Unfortunately, a well placed downward forearm block smashed into her two little toes. She broke the baby one a few years ago and it never healed properly so it does not take much to re-break it. There is not much Dr.'s do for a broken toe. She bought some sport tape at the drugstore and is going to tape them up. I'm sure she'll use it as an excuse not to take me for a walk later on tonight.

One Prize I Don't Want to Win

I admit, sometimes my hair looks messed up. I have a permanent case of bed body most all of the time. The only way I look really cute is when Linda gets me shaved. A close cropped hair cut makes me look way thinner too. Even when I'm chubby and fluffy, I still would not win the ugliest dog contest. This year a Chihuahua won the $1,000 prize. Princess Abby was rescued from her veterinarian. She has a weird eye and curved back, possibly from inbreeding. The four-year old pooch is much loved by her human new human. I wonder if she even has front legs?

Friday, June 25, 2010

8 more lives to go!

This cat looks just like Licorice, Chips old boyfriend. Lic died from tumors in his tummy. Linda loved him so much and still misses his cuddles. This cat, Oscar was badly injured and almost died. His doctors did a groundbreaking operation and attached little fake feet to his back legs! The implants have a special coating that will encourage bone cells to grow on the metal. Oscar was standing the next day and tried to walk. Now he is running and jumping! Wow. If my back legs ever get so bad I can't walk, maybe Linda will let me have this surgery.

Ta Da!!

Our deck is just about done! Taylor is coming back tomorrow to do a second coat. It looks so amazing, Linda is jumping with joy. She is also jumping because the stain must have angered a nest of teeny black ants. They did not like the deck stain as much as Linda because they came off the deck into our kitchen. When Linda got home from class, the entire counter was just covered in ants. Yuck and Double Yuck! She sprayed and set out traps, they better be gone and never come back. Ants are so oogy! (In the photo, it looks like he missed a bunch of spots. The light parts in the photo are just the sun casting shadows.)

Thursday, June 24, 2010


Here is all the news that is happening around my house: Our deck is really coming along. Taylor is done with the power washing, sanding and now he is staining and sealing it. The color is beautiful, we are so excited to see it when he is finished. There will be a big picnic to celebrate the new look. I don't want to post any photos until it is complete, probably by the weekend. Tierney has some good news. Her iPad came today! She has been tracking the shipping all the way from Hong Kong to Alaska and finally to Tierney's happy little hands. Jerry is coming to take me for a walk tonight. Linda teaches 6 classes today and has no time (or energy) to give me a long walk. She already taught 3 and is resting a little bit before her 3 night classes. More exciting news: I'm on day 4 without using the pee-pee pad! I'm holding it all day/night and only going outside for potty breaks. Night time is a little scary though. Jerry said a opossum or a raccoon might eat me out in the dark backyard. Linda wants to put up a big spot light out on the deck so she can see me while I sniff around. No news on Chip Cat. She is still boring, mean and stinky.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010


Just more proof that cats are not the brightest crayons in the box. Maybe Linda can get an old pair of Taylor's sneakers and leave them out where Chip can find them.

Toto, I Don't Think We Are in Hungary Anymore

During our walk tonight we heard huge thunder claps. When we got back home, the TV had a report that severe storms where in our area and to stay inside. Good thing we got inside in time. A dog in a Hungarian village was home when a storm ripped the roof right off his house. He was blown 20 miles away from his house! The dog, renamed Lucky, was reunited with his owner after a local radio station aired an appeal for help. Linda said if the storm gets bad, we are hiding in the closet under the stairs.

Walking for a Cause

I love my long walks with Linda. On Saturday, Jerry usually does an even longer walk. We sometimes walk for 45 minutes! That is pretty impressive as far as I'm concerned. To the two dogs who walked 826 days and over 2,000 miles, it must seem lame. The dogs, Murphy and Hudson walked with their owner to raise awareness for canine and human cancers. After the man lost his beloved dog Malcolm to cancer, he sold his truck, put all his stuff into storage and set out with the other two dogs to raise money for cancer research. Along the journey, many other dog lovers joined him who had also lost dogs to cancer. Phase two of his quest is to get 2,000,000 dogs to walk to miles for cancer. Sign me up! I'm going to join the crusade. (Linda is tearing up while I type this. She is such a cry baby.)

Get Out of My Bed

Linda finally found out why Chip hates me so much. She could never figure out why Chip was so crabby with me. Today, the mystery was solved. Between her classes, Linda was sitting on the deck working on her two new routines. Chip was sunning inside the sliding glass door and I was mad at her because she was laying in the pet bed I wanted. (There are 3 by the door, and I claim them all!) I barked at Chip non-stop for a solid hour. Even Linda got annoyed at me. How was I supposed to know that my constant yipping is annoying? Maybe the dumb cat should have just moved and gone down into the basement where it belongs! Linda said that even she would hiss and swat at me if all I did was bark at her all day. Just look at that smug look on Chips face. I wish I was a Pitt Bull so she would be afraid of me.

Monday, June 21, 2010


The lawn man came and cut our grass this evening. Good thing too because the backyard was getting taller then me. I hate when that happens! I have to wind my way around the tallest weeds to try and find a good "outside pee-pee pad" place. Now that I'm taking care of business out back, I don't have "inside accidents" any more. I'm really quite proud of myself. Linda was gone for 3 classes today and then she went to a party tonight. I was able to hold it in for a long time without a single slip-up. She has also taught me a new trick. It's called BANG YOUR DEAD. When she does the BANG, I fall down on my side and stick my feet up in the air. I loved making her laugh over and over tonight. Plus, I got little cookie bits each time I played dead. I should make a youtube video.

I'm Scared!

Last nights walk was a fiasco. After church around 9:00 p.m., Linda got my harness and leash ready. At first I was beyond excitement, but before we even got out of our yard, things changed drastically. For some reason, people all over the neighborhood were setting off fireworks. Not the tiny "pop" kind, but the kind that go rocketing up in the air and explode into sparkles. I was freaking out and almost jumped from the ground into Linda's arms! After about 5 minutes, she carried me back home and put me in my "safe" bed. It's not even July 4th yet. What am I going to do when it is the weekend that everyone sets off the fireworks? Linda is going to read some more Dog Whisperer books and see what he recommends.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Happy Father's Day

Kick back, watch some TV and grab your favorite beverage! Happy Father's Day Jerry. I have a prize for you next time you come over to take me on an adventure!

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Hello? Hello?

It was my day with Jerry today. Linda can't figure out how I can tell which day is Saturday, but she says I act different while she gets ready to go to teach her classes. I don't beg to be walked like I do every other day. I just know that Saturday means Jerry and that means a long walk. He took me into the woods on the trail just like he normal. We were having a great time when we happened upon a box turtle crossing the path. At first his little neck was stuck out and he was chugging along. As soon as I ran up to him, he hunkered down into his shell and froze. It was all very interesting, but honestly... the turtle did not want to play and he was really rude.

But Mommy, I HAVE to go NOW!

"If you're holding out for Universal popularity, I'm afraid you will be in this cabin for a very long time." by Albus Dumbledore. I hate waiting while Linda mixes up my food. She makes me sit quietly on my kitchen bed and won't let me come off until she tells me the food is ready. I also hate waiting inside the front door before our walks. She makes me stay in the foyer with the door wide open. I can't walk through the door unless she invites me. The 20 second wait is agonizing. Imagine if you loved Harry Potter and wanted to attend the grand opening of The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Universal Studios in Orlando? This was the line on Friday to get in the park. Linda said she would take one look at the line and turn around to go to Disney World just 15 minutes away. I bet the line for the Animal Kingdom park was only 2 or 3 people long since it seems like every single person in Orlando was waiting to get into Harry Potter.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Short Leash

I just came home from a 50 minute night walk with Linda. It was wonderful. She let me walk as far ahead as I wanted and let me sniff as long as I wanted. I'm glad I don't live in Greater Manchester though. A new law limits the length of dog leashes to 6'5". The council said that having a shorter leash on your dog will make it more likely that people will clean up after their dogs. I'm not sure I understand that. Why would a shorter lead make people pick up their dogs poo? If your dog is on a longer leash, cops will fine you. (We could not figure out the conversion. In American dollars it's either $1,455 dollars or .66 cents.)


I love my life and would not trade it for anything in the world. Maybe we don't have a Miami Beach mansion. So what if I don't wear Cartier collars. Who needs doggie-day spas? Little Conchita the Chihuahua was left a $7 million Miami Beach mansion and $3 million in cash when her human died. The house staff also received $25 million to care for Conchita and her two pup buddies. The Chi will continue to receive her spa treatments and be clad in expensive designer clothes. The woman's son is not so happy. He only inherited one measly million dollars. He is suing Conchita for the money. There must be a reason that the lady did not leave the son the bulk of the money. Maybe he was mean to Conchita. (Taylor, you better be nice to me next time you come and visit or else.....)

Thursday, June 17, 2010


Bob cut down another tree in our front yard and trimmed the two that are left. It is so naked now, but our house does look bigger. He left the big pine tree with the cut out in the back where we store our trash can. It is the perfect hiding space. The home owner people give you a ticket if you leave your trash can visible from the curb, so Linda is happy that we could at least keep that tree. It's scary that someone can give you a ticket if they don't like the color of your shutters, the height of your fence or if you put up a little shed in your backyard. Speaking of fines, now the people in Australia will be ticketed on the spot if a police officer hears them say even one swear word in a public place. There will be a zero-tolerance policy to inappropriate language. If that happens in the US, some people will be paying $1,000's of dollars a day in fines for their swearing. At least Linda won't get a ticket for that since she only says appropriate words.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Pack Leader

We had a giant thunder storm late this morning. Linda just got home from her first class, just minutes before it started. Perfect timing because the thunder made me so scared I was shivering! She learned from Cesar not to baby me when I am afraid because that only reinforces the behavior. Instead, she let me sit next to her but not on her lap. Then she ignored me during the worst of it. About 2 minutes into the storm, I laid down and closed my eyes. See! It works. If she would have rocked me and cooed don't be scared words, I probably wouldn't have relaxed because I would think something was really wrong. I love Cesar. Since he is divorcing from his wife, maybe Linda could marry him so he could be my pack leader. (Linda just said NO WAY Jose'!)

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Sit Down Already!!

What is going on at my house? Since early this morning, Linda and a friend have been moving boxes, rearranging things, taking stuff outside and cleaning like crazy people. I've been very upset because Linda has totally ignored me for the last 9 hours. Plus, she shampooed the downstairs carpet and I HATE that darn machine! She said she is getting rid of all her "junk" and I better get used to it. Every spare minute she has she will be going through boxes, closets and storage stuff. Eventually, (hopefully) we are going to move to a small townhouse instead of our big 5 bedroom house. The sooner she can empty the house out, the sooner we can sell it. I hope Chip is sold with the house.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Water Buffalo

This is the perfect news story for my blog. A man had to be rescued from his home when a giant stuffed water buffalo head fell off the wall and trapped him in his recliner! The man was able to reach his cell phone and called 911. He screamed to the dispatcher "Help! I'm trapped under a water buffalo head! Send and ambulance cause I'm crushed!" Cops and emergency workers came to free the trapped man. Looks like the water buffalo got the last word. The man will think twice before he hunts again. Since Chip looks so much like a water buffalo, I decided to use her photo.

Sunday, June 13, 2010


This is my favorite news story ever. You all know how seeing eye dogs help blind people live perfectly productive lives. Now a seeing eye dog, 90 pound Leo. is leading his best friend Ellie every where she might want or need to go. Ellie was rescued from a puppy mill. She is a tiny spaniel who is almost completely blind. I won't tell you the details of why she is blind, it's too horrendous to write what puppy mills are capable of. Anyway, Leo has become Ellie's eyes. He totally guides her every where and even keeps other dogs away from her at the dog park. If I could have, I would have carried my 90 pound Snickers around since he became lame right before he passed on. I know he would have done the same for me if I became blind or lame.

Saturday, June 12, 2010


I love Saturdays most of all since it is the day Jerry comes to visit me. He must really love me a whole bunch. Even though he has a horrible cold, he came over while Linda was teaching to take me for a trail walk and play fetch games with my favorite toys. After my huge adventure last night combined with the heat, I was too tired to do much more than walk slow on the trail. Then I slept on his lap while he watched cartoons and drew monkeys with lizards for brains. I'm a spoiled little pooch, but I am very thankful and appreciative too! Some dogs spend their whole lives in a dog house or chained to a tree. I am treated like a princess... loved and protected every single minute of my life.

Friday, June 11, 2010

Pond Ness Monster

What an exciting night! Linda took me to "family night" up at church this evening. Family night is basically when everyone gets together for big fun. You can choose soccer, volleyball, basketball, Frisbee, board games, cards, eating, or just chilling in lawn chairs. Tier took me up to the giant soccer field and we watched Taylor play. All was fine until one of Tierney's friends named Leah, came walking up with her 80 pound German Shepard. No joke, the dog licked it's lips and fixated on me... creeping slowly towards me. Linda scooped me up from the grass and stood up. Leah said that the dog actually has eaten a bunch of rabbits on their property. I kind of look like a rabbit, so I can see where he might have been confused. Then, when we walked back though the woods to our car, Linda saw The Pond Ness Monster in the church pond! You can see it's head and body in the photo!!


Yipeeee! First phase of the deck is all done. The power washing is finished and now the wood looks like new. This weekend, we have to stain and seal it so it will stay looking pretty. Taylor stayed and watched some of the world cup soccer with me while Linda was teaching, but he would not let me touch him. For some reason, I'm the only dog that he is highly allergic to. Snickers and Dipsie Dog did not bother him at all. Even Chip Cat can sit on his lap. If he even sits on a couch that I just jumped off of, he sneezes like crazy. Also, his eyes get bright red and itchy. After the staining, Linda is going to ask him to paint the outside trim of our house.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Bam! Boof! Ooops!

Looks like this little boy did not get the Batman memo. He is looking pretty embarrassed to be Robin.

Really Almost Done

OK, the deck is still not done. Taylor had to leave early to go meet Sarah for some chores he has to do around his house. There is about 1 more hour of power washing and then comes the staining and sealing. It is going to be so beeeuuutiiiful when it is done. Linda promised she would grill me a small piece of salmon when we have our picnic to celebrate its completion. Oh, and we just found out that the big giant pine tree on the other side of our house has to be cut completely down! Now there won't be any trees at all in our yard. Linda is sad, but I said she should be thankful that we have a giant 5 bedroom house all to ourselves... even without any trees it is wrong to grumble and complain. (Taylor and Sarah on the beach during their vacation a few weeks ago. She is so pretty, no wonder he wanted to leave quickly to meet her!)

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Almost Done

Taylor and Sarah stopped over last night to visit us. As you can tell, they were on their motorcycles. I think Sarah looks cute with her jacket and helmet on. Taylor wanted to show Sarah all the hard work he has been doing on our deck. It probably has one more day of power washing and then the water sealing before it is ready to unveil. Linda is going to have a picnic to show off her newly restored beautiful deck. Of course Taylor will be the guest of honor since he did all the hard work.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Little Man

Linda loves teaching her Tae Kwon Do kids. They are all so cute and obedient in class. One of her favorites is Connor. This is his Kindergarten graduation photo that was on his classroom bulletin board. When she saw what he wanted to be when he grew up, she was so tickled. He's just 6 years old and has already promised Linda that he would stay with her and be her student until he is a grown-up.

Power Hour

Taylor came over to power wash our house and deck today. It was such a big job and took so many hours, that he has to come back tomorrow to finish. The parts of the deck he did finish look brand new! Thank you Taylor for helping Linda fix up our house.

Nom Nom Nom

I tried a new food today and ...drum roll please.... it is so much better then chicken that I don't know if I'll ever want chicken again. Linda grilled a piece of fresh salmon outside on the deck. I was playing in the backyard while it cooked and as soon as I caught a whiff of the delicious aroma, I ran up to check out what was cooking. It was only a small piece, but Linda shared her meal. Chip got a bite, then I got a bite. I was definitely not into waiting my turn though. Once I ran to eat Chips bite and I got a hiss and swat. Salmon tastes incredible, but Linda said one little 4 oz piece was almost $5, so I don't think I'll be getting it mixed in my dog food anytime soon. I'm glad Linda has decided to add fish in her diet for a little while.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Beauty and Beast

There was a day of beauty at my house today. Emily the hair artist did make over hair designs on Linda, Tierney and even Jerry! I was already so beautiful that I did not need any improvement. Well, that is not really true. I desperately need a hair cut too, but Emily does not specialize in dog hair cuts. Both Tierney and Linda got blond highlights and Linda got a stylish cut. Jerry got his hair cut like a rock star. They forgot to take photos, so I'll have to post some tomorrow. Until then, here is a shot of Taylor's giant arms and shoulders. His arms are so big they don't fit into his polo shirts anymore. .

Saturday, June 5, 2010

RIP Holly

Linda is so sad that our 24 year old holly tree had to be cut down today. She helped plant it before even Tierney was born. It used to be a tiny bush, barely a foot high. Over the years, it grew into two separate trees that took over one whole side of our house. In fact, the branches tore some of the roof off! It looks so bare and ugly now that the tree was killed in the chipper shredder machine. I'll post a real photo of our naked front yard tomorrow. At least Sarah's flowers still look lovely. Linda said we are going to plant some more on the bare side.

I'm Soooo Tired

Jerry took me on the trail for our adventure, but it was way too hot and muggy for me. I had to be carried because I was just too tired from the heat. Just look how pitiful I look! Granted, the humidity does nothing for my hair, but on the plus side.... I look positively skinny! The diet and exercise is really paying off. Now it's time for the tick-check massage.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Ahhhhh! Ooooohhh!

This is the second day that Linda has not let me go outside for a walk. It's over 90 and very humid. If it is cooler tonight, she'll take me once it gets dark. How am I supposed to get this last 8 ounces off if she does not walk me twice a day? There is no way I'm getting less food, I'm already down to the bare minimum to survive. (Not true says Linda. I'm actually getting more then the Doctor recommended. Why am I still starving then?) I hope she walks me before the big fireworks display. It's the first night of our towns annual festival and they always do the biggest fireworks show. All that booming, thunder clapping and bright lights will freak me out!