Adopt a Dog Today!

Because of the popularity of the movie "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" many people went out and purchased Chi-Chi puppies. Many of these people did not do their research and now those very dogs are in pounds and shelters looking for homes. Here are the good/bad aspects on owning a Chi-Chi. Good: Chi's are fiercely loyal, smart and full of personality. (These are all very true, especially the smart part.) Bad: Chi's bark if they don't get enough attention. We can also can get "mouthy" and nip strangers or unknown dogs. (Also true, I hate when anyone shows Linda the least bit of attention and ignores me.) Good: We live on an average of 20 years. Bad: As we get older, there are more health problems and that means big bucks. (I'm worth it!) Good: Chi's love to burrow and snuggle into shirts, blankets, laundry. (Oh Yeah! Give me a pile of warm laundry and I'm in heaven!) Bad: I do tend to scratch and try to dig a hole in Linda's blankets. Good: We fit perfect into purses and can easily be transported. (I love when my black carrier comes out of the closet. I jump right in all by myself.) Bad: What's bad about being carried everywhere?

Mum's for Mom's

I want to get Linda something nice for Mother's Day. I know she is not my real Mother and I never refer to her as Mom... but she does take great care of me and does all the things Mom's do to meet my needs and keep me safe. She loves me unconditionally, no doubt about that. Of course, I love her unconditionally too. All those Saturdays that she works long hours and then goes back out in the evening are hard, but when she comes home... it's kisses and joyous barks to greet her. To show my love, I would love to get her flowers. Not just any flowers, but a bouquet of mum's made into little puppies. Sarah's Mother is a wonderful flower arranger. I wonder if she could make these mum puppies? I think the single puppy looks like me, don't you?

New Friend

I'm finally getting used to "tie-out". In case you missed my previous posts, tie-out is where Linda puts a little collar around my neck and hooks me to this long tie-out post in the front yard. I can walk about 20 feet before I have to stop. Tonight, Linda washed her car, weeded and planted some new flowers. There are 3 little kids who live across the street. I was whining and crying trying to get their attention. Sure enough, the little 4-year old boy and his Dad came over to our yard to talk to us. The little boys name was Jack and he was really sweet to me. I've made a new friend. Don't believe this tee-shirt, I'm half Chihuahua and half Yorkie!

Happier Times Ahead?

Happy the Hippo may soon be Happier. Happy has lived in the National Zoo his entire life. He is the only male hippo at the zoo, so I'm sure he gets mighty lonely without female company. Happy is 27, that's still pretty young to get a girlfriend. Problem is, he weighs about 7,000 pounds. (Yikes, maybe he should have laid off the Ben and Jerry's.) Now the National Zoo is kicking Happy out of his current digs. They are expanding the elephant exhibit and need his home. Don't feel bad though because Happy will probably be happier in his new home. He'll be moving to a cooler climate at the Milwaukee County Zoo. His new bachelor pad will have a pool, a sandy beach and get this... two female hippos, Puddles and Patty. Zoo keepers are looking forward to welcoming a new baby hippo if things work out between Happy and Puddles or Patty. Have fun Big Guy!

Tinker Bell

This is the news story of the week, heck it's the story of the year! I'm not sure why they are not interrupting the Caps/Rangers playoff game right this very minute to report this story. The Biggest Loser has nothing on this news worthy item. The story has everything: pain, fear, hope, mystery, natural disasters, and a happy ending. I won't keep you waiting any longer. This past Saturday, a Michigan couple were setting up their display at a flea market. Their 8-month old Chihuahua Tinker Bell was standing on their trailer when a 70-mph gust of wind picked up the dog and blew her away! Tinker was nowhere to be found. Frantic, they contacted a pet psychic the following Monday. The psychic led them a mile away to a wooded area. There was Tinker Bell, dirty, hungry and crying for her owners. Tink went absolutely wild when she saw her humans and jumped into their arms. You can tell she loves her humans and that they love her. Linda better get the name of that pet psychic in case I ever get lost.

Ruby Tuesday

What do you get when you combine "ruby" and "puppy"? You get a dog named "Ruppy" or in this case, 4 dogs named "Ruppy". Why name 4 dogs the same name? Because they are 4 cloned dogs that a South Korean scientist engineered. Why include ruby in the name? Because the dogs glow red under ultraviolet light and their nails and abdomens even look red. Linda used to have a dog named "Ruby". It was named Ruby because when she was driving home with the adopted dog, she saw a Ruby Tuesday's restaurant and all of a sudden knew that was her name. Ruby was a regular dog and did not glow in the dark. The scientist say that the gene which makes them glow red could develop cures for human diseases. There is a lot of science involved that I don't understand so I am not going to try and explain it. What I want to see is a glow in the dark cat. If we could get Chip to glow in the dark, she would not be able to sneak out from dark corners and scare me half to death when I go use the pee-pee pad at night.

P.S. I forgot that I already wrote about the glow in the dark kitties last year. You can read about them if you look at the Aug. 28 2008 post.

RIP Lil' Bodie

What a sad day. Remember Bella, the Yorkie who gave me the beautiful winter coat? Her best buddy was a mini-Dachshund named Bodie. Bodie went to dog heaven today. Leslie, Linda's friend, is his human. She is the person who gave Linda the awesome pillow with my photo on it. Bodie broke his tiny back and could not walk. The only kind thing to do was to let him rest permanently in dog heaven. He is with my Snickers, his step-brother Bosco and all the other dogs in dog heaven playing and jumping in fields of sweet grass without any pain or suffering. You were a cute little dog who only got to spend 3 years on this earth. I'm sure you touched your family's life in more ways then you ever knew. Bye-Bye Bodie. (Linda cried last night when she found out, again today after Leslie sent her a text and even now while she is sitting here with me. I am kissing her tears away.)

Being an artist is better then being bacon

Since Pigs are in the news in a big way and the press is not good, I thought I would cover a story that "paints" piggies in a better light. These two little porkers live on a farm called Penneywell Farm in the United Kingdom. There owners are arts and craft type folks. The pigs got into some non-toxic paint in the studio and got it on their feet and snouts. Being crafters, the humans decided to put the pigs on a canvas and to see what would happen. The results? A beautiful painting. The two little cutie-patooties are now painting on a regular basis to raise money for the Farm Crisis Network. After reading this story, Linda got a glint in her eye. I think she wants to see what kind of artwork a paint-covered Chorkie could create.

Beware of Pigs, Deer, Birds, Cows, Cats......

This baby better wash her mouth out with soap! Pig flu is big in the news right now. First, lots of people died and got sick in Mexico from Swine flu. Then it came across the border to Texas and San Diego. Now, a bunch of high school kids in NY have it. They discovered the kids went to Mexico on Spring Break and bought back the virus. The kids parents are getting it to, so authorities say it is very easily spread with human contact. Awhile back, the news was full of Bird flu, and before that Mad Cow disease. Watch out for deer because you could get bit by a deer tick and get Lyme disease. I've never heard of Chihuahua flu, have you? I'm guess I'm safe from quarantine, thank goodness. I have heard of Cat Scratch fever. I better tell Linda to keep Chip in a room downstairs just to be on the safe side. We can keep her food bowl upstairs though.

Big in Spirit

And I thought I was little! I was a minuscule 25 ounces when I first came to live with my humans. Just a wee little pup with a LARGE personality. (Although I was 8 weeks old, maybe I was the same size as Dancer when I was born.) A Chihuahua named "Dancer" was only the size of a human thumb when he was born. The vet suggested that he be euthanized. But Dancer's mommy had been found abandoned, starved and neglected when she was adopted. She was also pregnant. Dancer had a will to live! Now the year old pup is 18 ounces and stands 4.1" from paw to shoulder. Of course Linda had to measure how tall I am. I'm now four and one-half pounds and stand 6" paw to shoulder. (I did not like Linda measuring me and kept trying to hide from the tape measure) I am still almost always the smallest dog everywhere I go.

What Happend to Spring?

It is SO HOT OUT. We tried to take a walk, but I could only make it 10 houses before Linda had to carry me. I'm not used to it being so hot and I get overheated easily. It's even hot inside for me since we don't have the air conditioner on. She put me out back to play in the fenced yard, but the grass is over my little head. Just my ears and tail stick out. Linda was going to mow the grass, but she is going to wait and see if her friend will mow it again like he did 2 weeks ago. Her shoulder is still very sore and we have a hill in the front and back. Plus, he has a giant mower and it goes so much faster. It would take her at least a few hours going slow and bagging the grass by herself. Yeah! That means she is keeping me company inside.

Home is where the Owl is

Yesterday, I had a BIG outing with Tierney. She took me to a "yuppie" outside towncenter mall near our house. There are very expensive stores and restaurants mixed with fountains, lots of places to walk and a slew of people. Some people walk their little purse puppies (and not so little as I found out.) It was fun, but exhausting. Linda was very nervous and had to do deep breathing to relax because she thought Tierney would lose me. Tier took a video of me meeting a Boxer. Maybe she'll put it up on my Facebook, but I'm not holding my breath. It's a good thing she did not go across the street to Home Depot. In other HD, a great horned owl lives right in the garden center. He swoops around ruling the whole area. A mom owl made her nest inside the garden area, then flew away after the baby owls were born. One of the baby owls fell to his death, but the second made herself at home and now rules the pansy's, peat moss and garden shovels. Owls are afraid of people, so it has not attacked anyone. Everyone loves the owl and even comes to the store just to see her 4-foot wing span swooping in and out of the plants. I just want to be careful, because I am the perfect snack size for a great horned owl.

See you later, alligator!

A few posts back I told you about the big beautiful fox that was roaming our neighborhood in the evening. Last night, Linda and I were sitting out on the front stoop when right before our eyes, the fox came walking down our street. Foxy was strutting down the side of the street right in front of my house! I whined and wiggled to go see him, but Linda would not let me off her lap. Tierney reminded us that when she was little, she wanted to grow up to be a fox trainer. She loved foxes for as long as she can remember. Maybe Tier can train him to be my buddy. One critter Tier has always been deathly afraid of is alligators. She can't even see them on TV without cringing. A poor women in Tampa woke up to an 11-foot 500 pound reptile sunning itself on her front porch. It took a trapper over an hour to get it safely into a truck to cart it to a safe place. P.S. As you can tell, I love Doug Savage and his Savage Chicken comic strips. Look him up on the web, all the comics make me laugh.

Princess Choopie

I just found out how much I like Prince. Not the dog named Prince, but the singing and guitar playing Prince. Linda had the TV on while she was working on the computer. When Prince came on TV and started singing with a high voice, I went crazy. My ears picked up, I ran to the TV and started singing (OK, whining) along. She was laughing at me and wished she had her camera to take a video of it! I would have been a YouTube sensation like the lady from Britain who sings so pretty. Maybe if Prince saw it, he would have asked me to come on tour with him. I think he might be a vegan like Linda. He has a song that goes "don't eat no red meat or white fish; or funky funky blue cheese; We're all members of the animal kingdom; leave your brothers and sisters in the sea."

Open Wide

Today is Take Your Kid to Work Day. That means you pack up Jr. and bring him to the office with you so he can see how hard his Mom and Dad work for their money. I guess if you are a waitress at a popular restaurant, the kid can carry the napkins or something. I bet it would really increase the tips if the child acted all cute. At Linda's corporate account where she teaches aerobics, she was hoping some of the parents would bring their children to class. Unfortunately, right at the time of her classes they held a big picnic for all the kids! This year, Take Your Dog to Work day is June 26. I am so going to all of Linda's classes and help her teach, especially when she does the Downward Dog and Doggy leg lifts. This Doctor had his dog help him examine his patients. Good work getting that Cat to open his mouth.

Pixie Pixel

Check out this adorable Chorkie. His name is Pixel and he reads my blog. I'm feeling a love connection big time! I'm not sure what state he lives in, but I think we would make a very cute couple. We are exactly the same size and we even look alike. His humans are Tonya & Corey. I'm glad Pixel has a family who loves him as much as my family loves me.

Pawsengers

Maybe this is a sign that the economy is looking up. A new company called Pet Airways said that they are starting an airline for pets. Weekly flights will fly between NY, DC, Chicago, Denver and LA. The average fair will be $250 for a one-way ticket, but of course smaller animals like me will pay less. (Never mind, because I would fly first-first class with all the best amenities.) We would not have to go in a cargo hold, but we would travel just like people in the cabin. All the seats in the 19-seat turbo-prop plans will be removed so we can be comfortable. Airways will have pet check-in lounges for us to wait for our flights. One big problem, no humans are allowed on the flight, it's only for pets. There is no way in # @ double & that I am flying anywhere without Linda by my side. I won't even walk off the deck into the backyard unless she sits at the bottom of the deck steps.

Rescue Me!

Linda met 2 of her good friends for coffee today at Starbucks. The conversation turned to getting another dog. Mary suggested that Linda go to the local animal shelter, but Linda said no way! If she saw those poor dogs facing euthanasia, she would bring them all home. That is exactly what a women did in California when she went to the pound looking to replace her own doggy who went to dog heaven. Instead of bringing home one dog, she loaded 27 dogs into her pickup truck including 10 Chihuahua mixes, one pure bread Chihuahua, one Jack Russell, one poodle, 2 shepherd mixes, 2 mini pinchers and one Australian cattle dog. Neighbors called the police because of all the barking. The "law" came and told her 3 dogs per household was the limit. The women advertised online and found home for all but 4 of the dogs. I'm sure the Chihuahua's all went first. She is trying to find homes for the other 3 before her husband gets home from his business trip. I wonder which one she will keep? Snickers was a rescue dog. He was 6 months old when Linda rescued him. He was abused and took awhile to stop being scared of everything, but once he felt safe... he was the BEST dog in the world!

Choopie thru the Years

I was just thinking how much I've changed since I first came to live with my family. Wow... I was one strange looking puppy. Now I am adorable, everyone says so. I'm getting cuter and cuter as I age. If I'm this irresistible now, how will I look when I'm 4! Whoa. The yawning one is when I was just a few weeks old. The one by the window was before my new haircut and the centerfold shot is a few weeks ago after my day of beauty at the salon. I look so much better in short hair. My head and ears look huge in the puppy shot! How in the world was I able to hold that giant head up with such a pencil neck?

The Fourth Monkey

In Brazil, there are a lot of monkeys in the city parks. This is the same exact problem that the park had in Washington State, except they had squirrels running everywhere. If you read the post from 4/14, you'll see that they decided to blow up all the squirrels and kill them dead to solve the problem. In Sao Paulo, Brazil they are going to deal with the monkey problem in another way I like much better. To keep the expanding Capuchin population in check, they are going to capture all the male monkeys who live in the park (about 25 of them) and perform vasectomies on them. After, they will be released. Each male has an average of 8 female mates, so by doing the snip-snip surgery, the girl monkeys wont get pregnant. I think that the people in Washington State should do the same thing to all the male squirrels instead of blowing them to squirrel bits.

My Doggy Daddy

Jerry and Linda were talking today after lunch. I pretended I was sleeping, but I was really listening to their conversation. Linda wants to get another big dog to protect us from bad guys. Snickers was the best watch dog ever while his legs still worked. Towards the end, he could not maneuver up the stairs very well, but his bark was still scary. These photos are during the first week I came to live here. He treated me like his baby from the very first day and was always super gentle and loving to me. Look, he's even seeing if he can get my whole head in his mouth in one bite. I miss my Daddy Dog and I don't want another dog to take his place.

Foxy Choopie

Linda promised me we were going to go for a walk when she got home tonight since it is so warm out. She was really near our house when she saw a big beautiful fox run right in front of her car. She decided not to take me because she told me the fox might eat me if it's hungry. How could he eat a cute little puppy like me? Besides, I look a little foxy, don't you think? I think she was just trying to get out of taking me for a walk. She was plumb tuckered out from her big weekend.

The Results are In....

Linda is going to have to learn to cope with the pain in her shoulder since it is permanent and not ever going to get better. Her Dr. said it was the worse case of advanced degenerative arthritis he has ever seen in someone her age. In fact, it is on par with a body builder who abused steroids for years or someone who had a traumatic injury in did not seek treatment. The only option is a shoulder replacement in the future. I have been very nice to her when she has been pouting and sad. These smile face hearts are exactly what she needs. For someone as active as she is, it's bad news... but she knows she has to be thankful that she has two arms & legs and can move around without assistance.

I'm Bored!!

Today was the longest time I've ever spent alone, it was so boring (I know, I'm super spoiled!) Jerry had to "make art" for a show he is doing and could not come for his usual Saturday romp. Linda left the house at 7:30 this morning and did not get home until 3:30....8 hours with no company and nobody to play with. She had 2 new exciting classes to teach and then did two TKD demos at different places. It was her first time ever breaking a 2 board reverse punch and a 4 board sidekick! These are not little boards either, but big hefty pieces of lumber as you can see from the photo. At her second demo, 60 people came to watch. Even some local firemen who were out in the parking lot came inside to watch her. This afternoon, we spent an hour out back in the yard so I could chase birds, butterflies and bees. I can't believe it but she is going back out in a little because she has dinner plans. I'm going to pee-pee on the carpet because I am mad.

Say NO! to Vacuums

I had the scare of my life tonight. Linda locked her keys in the car and had to "break" in the back door. I was a terrible watch dog. I hid and cried until I saw it wasn't a bad man and it was just my beloved human. Some watchdog I am. If Snickers was still alive, Linda might have lost her leg the minute she stepped inside. I guess he knew her smell though and it would have all me fine. At least I did not run downstairs and hide like Chip did. To make matters worse, she did not finish the vacuuming today and had to do it late after she got home. I hate the roar and vroom sound and I was already shook up from the sneaky way she came inside. It's all good now and we are snuggled on the bed.

Long Lost Twin

Finally, a sunny day! Tierney took me for a long walk since Linda teaches all day. I'm so tired now I can just barely stay awake. She promised to post the video of our last walk, but so far she has not uploaded it to my Facebook page. Hey Tier! Where is my video? Maybe she'll put it on YouTube too. There is a YouTube video of this 47 year old women who is now super famous. She was on this singing contest show on TV. Everyone made fun of her when she came on stage because she was kind of frumpy. As soon as she started singing, people were falling off their chairs. She has a beautiful voice. Now her whole life is changed because of 90 seconds of singing. If Tier posts my video, maybe my whole life will change too and I'll be famous. First thing I am going to buy with my new-found fame is another Chorkie puppy so I'll have someone to play with when I'm home alone. What about this little one? She's adorable... (that is because we look like twins!!)

Dolphins 1 Pirates 0

No, this is not a sports score. It is what really happened in a place called the Gulf of Aden. These bad Somali pirate men have been attacking all the ships and taking people hostage. I guess they watched too many Johnny Depp movies or something. Anyway, the other day when they were about to attack a Chinese merchant ship, thousands of dolphins prevented the attack by swimming in between the two ships. This is truly amazing to me. Next time Chip is about to attack me from underneath the dark bed, I'm going to hope the dolphins come and save me too! I don't think the cow participated in this particular rescue effort, but the photo made me laugh.

Screaming Monkey

I have been starving the last few days. Linda can't feed me enough. I hope I don't end up like that poor pig I wrote about yesterday. Plus, it's been pouring rain and I have not had a walk in days. We've been playing "catch the flying-screaming monkey" up and down the hall, so at least I am moving about. I have to be careful of Linda's shoulder though. She can't throw or play tug of war with her left arm. She went to some crazy witch doctor who shot her full of blue dye and did a x-ray test in this big white tunnel machine that BANGED and HAMMERED really loud. After the test, she could barely move her shoulder at all. It feels a little better now, but it still hurts. She'll find out from the orthopedic Dr. on Friday if she needs surgery. I really hope she doesn't, but I have to say I kind of liked (OK, loved) when she had her knee replacement. She was home 24 hours a day for 2 weeks! I laid on her tummy and kept her company.

This Little Piggy had (too much) Roast Beef

Linda has plans this summer and I will be spending a long weekend at Jerry's house so he can puppy sit me. I've never slept away from home before. As long as I'm with Jerry, I don't think I will be too stressed. He better be careful what he feeds me though. I beg for food by doing the "dance". I also roll over and wave my paws. He might break down and give me too many treats. A women who was pet sitting a potbellied pig wasn't very careful about the pig's diet. She let it eat so much that the piggy tripled its weight and her collar got embedded in her neck. The court said the pet sitter must pay the vet bills that could go over $1,000 and she received one year of probation. Jerry will probably walk me 2 or 3 times a day while I'm there. I do a special bark and wiggle when I want to go on the trail. I've got both my humans are wrapped around my little paw. (This is not a photo of the fat pig, but I loved how cute she looked! It is exactly my size.)

The Squirrel Population is Exploding

Literally.... In Spokane, Washington, The Finch Arboretum is being overrun by ground squirrels. The critters are digging tunnels and causing people to trip when they visit the park. They also eat the tree roots. (The squirrels, not the people). The Parks and Rec people are bringing in the pros to deal with the problem. Seems there is a machine called the Rodenator Pro that will detonates the poor guys in their under ground tunnels. The killing machine pumps propane and oxygen into the tunnel and then send an electric spark that causes a shock wave. It kills the squirrels and collapses their tunnels. The maker of the machine says it is all very human. There is even a YouTube video showing the machine. Does exploding the animals sound humane to you? Here is my idea: Why don't they get one of those trucks that suck out the gunk from Don Jon's. They can stick the hose into the hole and suck up the squirrels. Once they get them all in the truck, they can relocate them to another area. Or even better yet, the people who are tripping in the holes should just watch where they are going.

Happy Easter!

Hear comes Choopie Chorkie-tail, hopping down the Chorkie-trail...Hippity-Hoppity Easters here today! Don't I sound exuberant? Well, as you can see in the photo... I'm not looking too happy. Why in the world Linda gets pleasure out of putting monkey outfits, sombreros and bunny ears on me is beyond understanding. She even bought me a little wedding dress for Taylor and Sarah's wedding. Fortunately, she misplaced it in all the rush planning so I never had to wear it. I'm praying she never finds it so I don't have to wear it when Tierney gets married. Linda said that I should just suck it up and be a good Chorkie. It's not like I have to wear bows on my ears or sundresses out in public. P.S. I admit that I look pretty cute though. Peter Rabbit has nothing on me!!

Turtle Power!!

Can you imagine if you had to go round and round and round in circles for 150 years? I know that sometimes I can feel a little bored doing the same walk every day. We try to take different trails, paths and sidewalks so I can smell new aromas. Now, a 5-year old green sea turtle named Allison won't have to spend the last 100 years of her life swimming in circles. Allison, a green sea turtle with only one flipper, has been going around and around and around for most of her life. She lost a fin in a horrible shark attack so she could not swim straight. This week, Allison was fitted in her very own black neoprene suit with a carbon dorsal fin on the back that lets her glide gracefully with the other turtles.

Have You Seen This Dog?

Please help reunite Sparky with his 92 year old human. On Tuesday, the Shih-Tzu-Poodle mix was nabbed out of his own front yard. Sparky is like a son to Charles Boyd. Mr. Boyd is not eating or barely sleeping because he misses the light of his life. He is walking around in a trance from grief just looking for a sign that Spark is back home. Two teenagers were spotted running from the area carrying a small dog. Those boys need to bring Sparky back! The whole neighborhood is looking for the pooch, and local newspapers, radio and TV stations have joined in on the search. If you see Sparky or know any information, please call 202-727-9099.

UPDATE: THANKS TO MY BLOG PLEA (MAYBE-PROBABLY) SPARKY HAS BEEN RETURNED TO MR. BOYD!

Wanna be Friends?

Tierney took me for a long, long walk today, at least that is what she told Linda. For Tier, a long walk is 8 houses instead of walking 4 houses. She took video of me scooting along and I am going to post it on my Facebook page. If you read my blog and want to be friends, look me up. I'm known as ChiChi Chalupa. To be my friend you can't use any bad language or post negative things about people. Only positive, happy friends need apply. There are a lot of photos of my family and I that I don't put on this blog.... like these from Myrtle Beach.

Tossing and Turning

There is another plus to my new short hair-do. The harness that I wear on my walk used to tug on my fur. Every couple of feet I would shake to try and free the pulling hair. Today on my walk, I did not have to shake one time! I just pranced along enjoying all the smells and sights without any tangles in the harness at all! Tier saw me for the first time today and thinks that I am absolutely adorable. She is sick today and did not go to school or work. We spent the whole day together lolling in bed. Linda is still in a lot of shoulder pain. I hope the Dr. can figure out what is wrong so she can get it fixed. I hate to see her in such pain. It kept her up til 4 a.m. so she only got 3 hours of kind-of-sleep. I was a good dog and did not wake her up to use the pee pad.

Stop Eating Scissors

What do you do when you run out of toothpicks and have spinach in your teeth? Well, how about using a pair of scissors? The smart man was using the scissors to clean between his teeth when he started laughing. The scissors slipped out of his hand and he swallowed them. Humans are very stupid (not mine though). Even I know not to eat a pair of scissors. Duh! The doctors got the scissors out and the man lived. I guess he'll stop on the way home and buy a box of toothpicks. The scissor company will probably now have to put a warning on the package not to pick your teeth with the implement. The man could sue since the scissors did not have a warning.

Prey don't Pray Silly

But maybe they should. Fisherman in the Philippines told authorities that they accidentally caught and ate a 1,300 pound megamouth shark, one of the rarest fish in the world. Only 40 other of the MM sharks have been recorded said guys from the World Wildlife Federation. They WWF tried to talk the fishermen into letting the shark go, but they took it to their village and ate it up (totally by accident according to the fisherman.) I feel so sorry for the shark. He obviously survived for a very long time in the ocean, and then a dumb fisherman's net is is undoing. The fisherman should have let him go and live another 100 years. Where was this chicken missionary when Mega-Mouth needed him?

They must have some giant lips!

I still can't get over how beautiful I look. All that straggly gray hair was really aging me. Why in the world didn't I get a hair cut sooner? Just a snip-snip here and a shear-shear there... here a snip, there a snip... every where a snip.. snip. (Ooops, sorry for getting carried away.) Seriously, I am so cute that Linda can't stop petting me. It's like that show "10 years younger". I really look like a puppy again. Funny thing is, when I was just 9 weeks old, I already looked like a grown-up dog. Someone at a suburban NY Victoria's Secret store also wanted to look younger. They stole 74 tubes of "Beauty Rush" lip gloss worth $1,200 dollars. All they had to do is visit Doggy-Do's Puppy Spa and they would look beautiful without shoplifting all that expensive lip gloss.

Choo-Who?

I just came back from the beauty parlor, Doggie Do's. Oh my gosh, I am so cute that Chip did not recognize me when I came home. Linda said I looked 10 years younger! When Linda dropped me off, I cried and cried when she left. They put me in a little cage with dogs all around me. It was supposed to take 5 hours, but I guess my crying and whining got me put to the front of the line because I was done in only 2 hours. I had a manicure, ear cleaning, hair wash with conditioner,
hair cut, blow dry and for the final touch, an Easter scarf along with 2 pink bows in my hair! Jerry picked me up and had to look at me twice because he was not sure I was Choopie. By the time we got home, I pulled one of the bows out of my hair. Linda got to see me with one bow, but I was so annoyed by the remaining one, she took that out and even took the scarf off for me. It wasn't so bad and definetly worth it since I look like a show-dog.

Why did the Frog Cross the Road?

There is so much bad news lately. THE ECONOMY, murders, natural disasters, sickness, I could go on and on and on. To counteract the sad and depressing news, here is a story to make you smile. In New Haven, Vermont, 45 people recently volunteered to stay up all night to stand on the side of the road with flashlights. Why? To help the amphibians cross the road. Every little frog, salamanders, frogs and newts were carried across the road during their annual migration to make babies. Without the helpers, most of the creepy-crawler-hoppers would not make it. I always get carried across the street for safety. The escorts called "bucket brigades" save the critters from being crushed by cars. After two hours, the crossing guards spotted 589 live amphibians and 97 pancake ones. The state is considering installing tunnels under the road at a cost of $350,000. Without the tunnels or human helpers, the species might not make it to the next generation.

Judge Dread

There is a man in Florida who has recently made the news because he is being a "bone-head" and not walking his dog on a leash. Some people think their dogs are special and don't need to be leashed like the rest of us. Snickers was a dog that would go ballistic when he met unleashed dogs on the trail. Snickers wanted to fight with the dog because he thought the dog was going to hurt me. A few times Linda had to sit on him and pin Snickers between her knees because a big dog ran up to us on the trail. She held me high above her head so I would not get chomped. We would have gotten sued because Snickers maimed their dog, when the dog was breaking the law by running free. He would have just been protecting me. Anyway, this loser in Tampa was fined $1,000 for not leashing his dog (after years of being told to leash him) and would not pay the fines. Now he owes so much money (over $100,000 with legal fees and interest) that he might lose his home. A bunch of supporters are saying that the guy is a hero and to leave him alone. If Snickers was still alive and we met him on the trail, he wouldn't be walking his dog without a leash because the dog would be no more.