Speak Softly and Carry a Big Lipstick

A long time ago Linda had a dog named Matty. It was a good dog, but it loved to chew stuff. It wasn't picky either: tissues from the trash, shoes, underwear, purses. Basically, anything on or near the floor was fair game. One day, Linda came home and found Matty covered in red lipstick. She had gotten into her makeup and destroyed it. Linda was mad but could not stop laughing because Matty looked hysterical with lipstick all over her face. It was probably yummy because most lipstick contains fish scales. It's what gives the gloss that "pearly" look. If that's not gross enough, a lot of face make up contains cattle, oxen or swine brain cells or other nervous-system tissue. Ewwww. I think when Linda reads this she will probably start buying vegan makeup.

I Yam What I Yam

You know its a very slow news day when I am writing about Popeye the Sailor Man. Linda just told me that the names of Popeye's four nephews are Pipeye, Peepeye, Pupeye, and Poopey. I don't know why I think this is so funny, probably because my name is Choopie and it rhymes with Poopeye. I could be their pet dog in the comic book. If we get another dog, we should name it Pupeye. I really like this painting. A women has a blog where she paints a different picture every 24 hours and posts it with a funny story or recipe. Kind of like me, but I can't paint...so I just steal other peoples work.

Cats are the Devil in Disquise

How many cats does it take to stop a run away train? I don't know, lets find out! Cats are very puzzling to me. There are some that are so cute and wonderful. I sometimes wish I had a kitten smaller then me so I could be the "big" dog instead of always the "little" dog. I try and take charge of Snicks and Chip, but it does not work. Some cats (won't mention names) are so ugly and mean that I have nightmares about them.

Yes I Have a Tattoo and No You Can't See It

The economy is affecting businesses owners of all types. Many Mom & Pop shops are having to come up with new ideas to bring in customers. The Renaissance Tattoo Parlor expanded its client base by inventing a method to tattoo pets. Renny Jones, one of the artists designed various tats including dog bones, pet toys, and custom designs catered to each dogs personality. The funny thing is that most owners are requesting butterflies, hearts, "Mom" and pin-up girls be tattooed on little Spot. I think I'll get a tat with Snickers face on it. My belly would be a perfect spot since there isn't any hair on it.

Sleep 'til You're Hungry, Eat 'til You're Sleepy

That is great advice. I love to eat and I love to sleep. I wonder why this guys are so tired? They look totally crashed out. When you are as little as we are, just tearing up and down the hall a few times is like you big humans running a mile in 5 minutes. Of course we are tired. When I jump up on Linda's big bed, it would be like you jumping up on your car roof, in one leap! I do get out of breath on walks outside longer then 3 houses, but that's what doggie totes are for!

SUV = (Sport Utility Victim.)

Gas prices only went up .40 cents a gallon between 1976 -1996. That's .40 cents in twenty years! December 2007, the average price per gallon was $2.10. The average price today, $3.97. That's an increase of $1.87 per gallon in 5 months. Whoa!! "They" are predicting $7.00 per gallon by mid summer. Linda is adjusting her teaching schedule so she can save on gas. Now she has 2 or even 3 classes back to back at the same gym. Her car does not get very good mileage, and sometimes she drives 20 minutes each way to teach one aerobic class. She also told me she is going to start riding her bike to teach some of the local classes. It would be so cool if I could ride with her. Since the Giant is within biking distance, I am going to get to go with her in this little pink bike basket. (I hope she orders it for me.) She should be thankful her car does not run on Whiteout. It would cost $3,939.64 to fill her tank. This list has been all over the internet, look at these prices and you might feel better next time you fill up.

1.- Snapple 16 oz for $1.29 = $10.32 per gallon
2. - Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz for $1.19 = $9.52 per gallon
3. - Gatorade 20 oz for $1.59 = $10.17 per gallon
4. - Ocean Spray 16 oz for $1.25 = $10.00 per gallon
5. - Quart of Milk 16 oz for $1.59 = $6.32 per gallon
6. - Evian (water) 9 oz for $1.49 = $21.19 per gallon
7. - STP Brake Fluid 12 oz for $3.15 = $33.60 per gallon
8. - Vicks Nyquil 6 oz for $8.35 = $178.13 per gallon
9. - Pepto Bismol 4 oz for $3.85 = $123.20 per gallon
10. - Whiteout 7 oz for $1.39 = $254.17 per gallon
11. - Scope 1.5 oz for $0.99 = $84.84 per gallon

Professor Fluffy

Linda is reading the first Harry Potter book and really loving it. She has never read them before even though Tierney has been telling her for years they are good. I'm happy she's enjoying it because she stays up late and reads. I get to sleep on her tummy until she is done, when she puts the book down... I run lickitty split down the hall into my bed in the kitchen. There are a bunch more books to go, so I should be gravy for another couple of months.

Cool Beans and Grody to the Max!

Miami Vice fashions; big hair with lots of hairspray; Jem and the Holograms; Garbage Pail Kids; Rainbow Bright; Where's the Beef; Trivial Pursuit; Smurfs; Hacky-Sac; Parachute pants; Boom Boxes; Jelly Shoes; AC/DC; Alice Cooper; Stirrup pants; guys getting 1 earing; Members Only jackets; Sweatbands; Van shoes; Leg warmers; Sassoon Jeans..... Can you guess what era these fads are all from? Tierney and her friends had a Friday night 1980's party. I didn't get to go, buy I saw her photos and they made me laugh. She looked cute. If I would have gone, I could have dressed up like Benji. The scary part is I still see some people on the street dressed like this.

If Barbie is so Popular, Why Do You Have to Buy Her Friends?

For some reason, I've been obsessed with Barbie dolls after I found that photo of Barb upchucking in the toilet. (see May 18 ). Tierney had a lot of Barbies when she was little, but they are all gone now to Barbie heaven. She still has some of her Polly Pockets and Pet Shoppe Pals though. Anyway, back to Barbie. This photo of the cat sleeping with her doll has really got me thinking. They now make Beanie Babies for dogs, Linda bought me a skunk from PetDumb the other day. It is really a Beanie Baby brand too, it's just squeaky and crinkly. It is my new favorite toy. What if I started a company that did Barbie and Ken dolls for dogs. They would be chewy, squeaky, pliable, and have chicken flavored yarn hair that we could pull on. I'm excited about this business opportunity. Tierney is a great artist, so maybe I'll get her to do some design sketches and we will post them. Since I wrote about this idea, it's patented to Choopie. Do not steal it or I will send Snickers after you.

" I Want to be in Your Arms....

......where you hold me tight and never let me go." Linda is going to the airport to pick up Tierney tonight. She has been on a church missions trip to the West Indies. I've missed her so much. She actually called from St. Kitts and I barked with her last night. She does this thing when she comes in the front door. In a really high pitched voice, she says "choo-choo-choo-choo...." and it makes me crazy. When she said that on the phone, I ran to the front door looking for her. Tonight I get to see her in real life. Love you Tier.

UPDATE: Linda is home from the airport. They cried and hugged and said I love You 100 times. She is visiting with her friends Dawn and Carlise and should be home soon. Yeah!

What if the Hokey Pokey is What its All About?

"You put your right foot in, you put your right foot out, you put your right foot in and you shake it all about...." People are always trying to connect with each other. They are looking for others who have the same interests and enjoy the same activities they do. There are ski clubs, running clubs, drinking clubs, even running clubs who drink while they run! There is a whole community of dog lover single groups. (Wait, that sounds wrong. I don't mean singles who want relationships with dogs, I mean singles who have dogs and want relationships with other singles.) K-9 Connection; Speed Dating with Your Dog; Beer With Your Buddy (they serve us the doggie beer I wrote about a few weeks ago) are just a few of the dog clubs around. Linda just joined POPP's. That stands for "Parents of Purse Puppies." It's a group of women with dogs under 5 pounds. In the book "A Dog Lovers Guide to Dating" it lists the top 5 and bottom 5 breeds for "date bait." I could not believe that chihuahuas 's are in the bottom 5! That is the most ridicules thing I ever read. Well, I am a Yorki-Chihua mix, so maybe I don't count. Who knows, I might actually make a new friend. I would never cheat on Snickers though. He's my hero. Linda has a children's book called The Pokey Little Puppy. I love that story.

Rover, Can You Believe the Price of Gas?

California has proposed a ban on driving with a dog in your lap. I agree with this. A few posts ago I blogged about buckling up your dog to keep him safe in the event of an accident. Once, Linda saw a women driving with a dog in her lap while talking on the cell phone. (The lady was on the phone, not the dog.) The ban says nothing about dogs driving themselves places though. Burger King drive-thru, here we come!

"I Wish I Had Time For Anothe Bowl of Chili." ----- Kit Carson

Oh No! Bad News for Linda. After Paul helped her clean the coils and then underneath the refrigerator (grossness) she went to Hard Times to get her favorite veggie burger with veggie chili, no cheese, no onions, no bread. It was dark & locked up tight. There was a sign on the door saying it was permanently closed forever. She has been going there a long time, even before Tierney and Taylor were born. It was the only place open on Thanksgiving that Linda could get a vegan meal. I am sorry she is upset, but there were never any leftovers for me when she ate there, so really... what's the big deal?

Cats-B-Gone

The Mega Sonic Scatter Cat is a repeller gun with laser-light sighting which repels cats and other nuisance animals without harming them. It has fast trigger action and cool laser-light sighting that effectively targets annoying animals up to 80 feet away. You won't disturb your neighbors because only the bad cats and annoying squirrels can hear it. Wait, if cats can hear it, I wonder if it will hurt my ears too? I'll have to wear ear plugs when ever I aim it at Chip. When I want to eat her food, just one pull of the trigger and she's history. It would be cool to have the upper hand with Chip once in awhile. I get tired of her pushing me around. You can buy yours on Amazon.com.

O! Say Can You See?

“It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God that such men lived.” -- General George Patton

Today is Memorial Day. It's more then just a convenient 3 day weekend or a chance to have a cookout and play volleyball. It's not the weekend the pool opens or the first beach trip of the year. It's definitely not the first day it's OK to wear white shoes. In fact, there are many who want to go back to the original day of observance, May 3oth. They feel like changing the date to make it a long weekend undermines the real reason for the holiday. I respect and honor all those who are currently serving and those who have given their life for my freedom while I lay snuggled safe and sound in my little pink bed. Read my entry on May 6th about Sallie, the dog who served faithfully during the Civil War. Do your part today, even if it is thanking just one Veteran for their service or saying a prayer for peace.

"I Very Little..." *

I watched the trailer for the new Indiana Jones movie. Linda saw it yesterday and said it was big fun. You wouldn't think so, but I have tons of adventure in my life. Every night, I race up and down the hall chasing my skunk that Linda throws. The cat hides in the kitchen and darts out at me when I run by. Sometimes, she hides behind the chair and tries to scare me into dropping my toy. It only gets me more excited and I run faster and faster. I also hid my treats from Snickers so he can't find them. I get to take the trash out and water the flowers every day with Linda. Everyone once in a while, I ride in the tote and go to Target or Starbucks for coffee with one of the girls. Tierney used to take me shopping at the mall, but I peed in my purse carrier once and she did not take me again. This guy looks horrible in his Indiana Jones outfit, he would look way better as Captain Jack Sparrow. (...you cheat very big! *says Short Round, Temple of Doom)

Buckle Up, It's the Law

I love researching new inventions and products. There are great new strollers, carriers, indoor treadmills, jewlery, clothes... all for dogs. Back in the day, you were lucky to get a leash and bowl.
Just look at this early dog tote for your car. This is a real advertisement from an old-fashioned newspaper. I guess there are just some people that don't want their pets in the car with them, (I'm glad thats not Linda or Tierney) and this must have been a way for them to travel with their dog. On the other hand, I much prefer the car seat that the second dog is using. That is definitely more my style.

Love is in the Air

I think this photo is pretty self explanatory. It's called the Hotdoll, a doggy love doll that helps pets channel their desires when....well, you know. This is hard for me to blog about. There was a time when I was younger that I had a slight problem with channeling my desires on my humans arms. I know, it's embarrassing to admit when you have such a problem, but it is in my past and have I have been "hump" free for many months. Although I have to admit that just looking at the picture brings back some good memories.

The Green Arches

This Thursday, a dumb lady from Wisconsin left the windows rolled down with her keys and doggy in the car while she went into the grocery store. You can guess what happened. A girl stole her car, along with the puppy inside! A surveillance tape showed the teenager stealing her car from the lot. A police officer spotted the stolen car at a gas station and arrested the teen. A search of the car turned up marijuana and a pipe. Both the owner and the teen denied ownership of the drugs. The pet was returned to the dumb lady, but that dog should really be placed in a foster home. That women is very irresponsible if you want my opinion. She must have had the munchies from smoking so much, that she ran in the store to get food without thinking of what could happen to her dog. Next time she'll use the McDonald's drive thru.

Best Friends....Again

Quick, I need a loan! Anyone out there have any extra cash they want to give me as a gift? Starting this Wednesday, BioArts International is holding registration for an auction so pet owners could get their pet cloned. The auction will be held on June 13th with initial bidding starting at $100,00. Only 5 people will win, and I plan on being one of them. This way, I will never have to be without my best friend, Snickers. I can't even put a price on my feelings for him. You couldn't pay me any amount of money to clone Chip though. That would be a never ending nightmare. (Look, you can see my little ears sticking up behind Snickers!)

GIANT DOG

This is a GIANT DOG, I don't mean a Big Dog, I mean a GIANT DOG. Snickers is a Big Dog, I am a little dog and Chip is a fat cat, but this brute has to be pushing 200 pounds. That is what Taylor weighs, and he is 6'5" tall! Can you imagine having to pooper-scoop after him? Call out the bulldozers!!

Only $1,100 and it's MINE!

Jeeze Louise! While I was online shopping for my swimsuit, I found a wonderful carrier. This isn't in Linda's price range, but it would be nifty if I could just test it out for a spin around Nordstrom's. Imagine the looks I would get if Linda set me up on the counter while she had a make-over at the Bobby Brown counter. Nah, I'm not really that pretentious. I'm most happy when the girls carry me in my black tote from Target.

Pass the sunscreen!

With Memorial Day right around the corner, it's time to start shopping for my swimsuit. I thought about a bikini, but I'm a little modest and don't want to show too much fur. This suit is adorable. It covers just enough, but is also a little sassy. Linda always buys Snickers a kiddie pool so he can cool off during the hot summer months. It will be fun to dog paddle back and forth under the watchful eyes of Snickers, Linda and Tierney. I'm not even sure if I can swim, so I better start out with water wings on my front feet just to be on the safe side.

Move Over Bat-Boy

I've recently blogged about Lizard Man in South Carolina chewing up the front of someones van and the Big Foot photographed by the Doctor in Colombia. I'm proud to announce that I think I discovered a new strange creature. I'm calling it a "Chiponkey" after the cat Chip who lives here with us. This creature is a little bit cuter then Chip and much smarter. Too bad Weekly World News is not being published anymore because I'm sure "Chiponkey" would make the cover. He would give BatBoy a run for his money as the most popular crypto-creature.

Little Wanton

You can own the earth and still / All you'll own is earth until / You can paint with all the colors of the wind.

Pocahontas (aka Little Wanton)

Polly Want a Cracker!

How smart is this? An African parrot who lives in Tokyo escaped from his cage. He was rescued from a roof in the nearby city. A concerned citizen took him to the police station where he spent the night. The next day he was taken to a local veterinary hospital while the police looked for the rightful owner. After a few days, the parrot started talking to the vet. He said his full name, and address, including the street number! Then he proceeded to sing songs to the vet staff. Soon the parrot, Mr. Yosuke Nakamura was reunited with his joyful owner. I won't be able to tell the vet my address if I ever get lost, but I have a cool special micro-chip in my leg that tells where I live and who I belong too. It would be awesome if I could talk though. "Hey Linda, Chippie want a cookie!"

Doggy Heaven

Every day poor Snickers is having more and more trouble getting up and down the stairs. I'm afraid that this might be it for the big guy. Linda is going to take him to the Dr. to see if his old body is just worn out or if there could be another problem. When Snick's does finally go meet Sheba in dog heaven, he can now be treated with dignity and respect. Pet funeral homes are opening all across the country providing the same quality-care that is offered to humans. Since Snicker's is a believer, we can arrange a pastor to do a service. Linda could also get a paw print or snout print as a memorial. There is a full line of caskets, urns and headstones to choose from. I really hope that his passing is a very long way off, but we are preparing ourselves just in case. He is much loved and the patriarch of our pet family: Snickers, Sheba, Licky, Chip and Rocky(the boa constrictor). Now it's just the two of us pups and Chip left here on earth.

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If Your Dog is Fat, Your Not Getting Enough Exercise

A veterinarian's association has recommended to the FDA that pet food labels contain the number of calories per serving to help combat obesity in pets. I think this is a good idea. There are also a few new things on the market to keep us in tip-top shape. I really want one of these doggy treadmills. When its dark or raining and I feel like a little aerobic exercise... all I have to do is jump on the treadmill and take a walk! While I'm at it, I can wear a pedometer around my neck to check just how far I walked. I'll have to see if Linda will order me a warm-up suit so I can look snazzy while I work out.

Feel the Burn!

Poor Linda. Her glutes are so sore from all the classes she is teaching that she can't get up the stairs very well. Today, she told me she taught 2 Body Pumps; 1 TKD class and then did 30 minutes on the stair mill. To cheer her up, I found this funny joke about Big Foots (or is it Big Feets?) doing aerobic classes. Check out that booty on the instructor Foot!

What's the Difference Between Big Foot and a Smart Blond?

Once upon a time, way back in 1930, a geologist named Dr. Francois de Loys was in a rain forest near the Brazilian-Colombian border. All of a sudden, two 5 foot tall creatures came out of the bush and started to approach his team in a threatening way. The men shot and killed one of the creatures while the other one fled off into the bush. Offically there are no apes in South Colombia and authorities could not explain this strange creature. This photo Dr. de Loys took shows the creature propped up after it was killed. After reading about Lizard Man in South Carolina last week, this story gives me the heebie-jeebies. I'm glad that the only strange creature in my life is Chip-Cat. Answer: Bigfoot exists.

A Hangover is the Wrath of Grapes

A few days back I blogged about a new doggie beer on the market. I have vowed not to touch the stuff. Good thing too, look what happened when this Barbie tried it. Just say NO to drinking. Let this be a warning to everyone who has thought about experimenting with drinking beer, mixed drinks or wine. The end result is never pretty and it is so bad for your health. I wonder if Ken is standing in the hall watching her? Ewwww.

Odor-B-Gone

Many nights all of us have to flee the room because Snickers has such bad gas issues. He can't help it, but gee-whiz, it's getting to the point that even Chip, who uses a stinky litter box, has to go upstairs. Some genius came up with this brillant idea. The Dogone Doggy Thong! The thong is made of a charcoal cloth that is designed to neutralize any odors. In other words, it traps the poot smell. Imagine the attention Snickers would get on the trail if he wore this during his walk. Woo-Hoo! He'd have to watch out that girl dogs did not get too randy with him. I'm almost a little jealous that I don't need one. After all, a lady always holds it in.

Would You Please Pass the Milk Bones?

Season Ten has just wrapped up on America's Next Top Model. I've become a fan of the reruns since Linda watches them while she is doing laundry or bookkeeping work on her lap top. What a surprise to see that Whitney, a plus size model, won! In the size 0's and 2's of the model world, Whitney's size 10 must seem behemoth. In reality, a size 10 is actually a size or two smaller then the average American women. While being fit and eating healthy is important, it will be good for young girls to have a role model who does not starve herself to fit in with what the media seems to portray is beautiful. This is important to me for a reason. Today, Linda weighed me and to my shock I've gone from 3 1/2 pounds to.....5 pounds! I am going to be proud of my size, even if it means having to get a new harness because my old one was too small. I hope I don't gain too much and get as big as this fellow.

You Can't Teach an Old Dog New Tricks

On May 15th, the Supreme Court of California overturned the ban on same sex marriages. This is the second state (Massachusetts being the first) to allow full marriage rights for the same-sex partner. I'm not sure how I feel about this decision. A few days ago I posted a photo of a kitty and a puppy caught in scandals tryst. That upset me, but if two adorable little Chorkies who were both girl pups wanted a special relationship... I guess that would be OK with me. That must be a big relief because the latest research shows that homosexual pets can't be cured. Don't waste your money on high-priced treatments, he'll eventually go right back to his old habits.

Bon Voyage Tierney!

Tierney is leaving tomorrow morning at 4:00 a.m. for a missions trip to the West Indies. This is her 5th missions trip, 3 to Africa and now 2 to St. Kitts. I will miss her very much. Poor Linda, she will be so sad without her. I do admire Tierney reaching out to others and giving of her time and resources. Knowing Tier like I do, it is really dying-to-self for her to live in primitive accommodations and eat goat brain soup for dinner. The last trip to Africa she picked up some kind of intestinal parasite and was sick for a long time. I'm believing she will be safe and come back healthy. Sometimes I feel bad that I am so selfish and expect Linda to wait on me hand and foot. I'm spoiled and I know it. Tonight I am going to share Linda's lap with Chip. Never mind.

Lizard Man Strikes Again

Lizard Man from South Carolina became a phenomenon 20 years ago when people began reporting a tall, big-eyed swamp creature roaming about. This 7-8 foot creature has been described as green or brown with bright red eyes. It is said to have 3 fingers ending in long black claws. Many people have passed polygraph tests and eye witnesses have all reported similar encounters with LM. A SC couple recently had the whole front of their van chewed up with bite marks right through the grill. Authorities are saying a big dog destroyed the front of their van. I'm going to vouch right now for Snickers. He is a big brownish dog with long black claws and he has been known to chew things. There is no way he is involved in this incident and thats my final story.

___

In the Name of Cats From Outerspace

Catholics can finally breath a sigh of relief. The church has now confirmed that aliens from outer space may or may not exist. This is good news to all the X-File and Star Trek fans who might have been compelled to repent in the confessional every Saturday night. Personally, I believe in life from other planets. I see enough weirdness just living with Chip cat. If cats aren't from another planet I'd be shocked and surprised.

Beer is Technically a Vegeterian Meal

A British company is now importing a Dutch non-alcoholic, steak-flavored, nutrient-enriched malt-barley flavored beverage called "Tail-Wagging Beer". It sells for $3.85 per bottle, which is a little steep for Linda's pocketbook right now, even if it is Vegan. Besides, could you imagine if Snickers and I got a little too happy one day while Linda was at work. Yipes, the SpotBot would probably burn up with the mess she would have to clean up. I think I'll just say NO to beer.

A Rose By Any Other Name....

I have heard that pets sometimes look like their owners. These two guys look exactly like their pets. I wonder who I look like, Tierney or Linda? Probably Tierney since she has the same color hair as I do.

Rated PG13

This is a family blog for all ages, but this photo of these two love birds really makes me shake my head. How could this Choopie look-a-like even think about a tryst with a kitty? Even if the kitty is a cutie-cat, I still think its just too weird. I'm all for a little cuddling and canoodling, but please...lets keep our heads about us. Dogs go with dogs and cats go with cats. OK? You'd never catch me with Chip in this compromising position, no way Jose.

We Interupt This Program...

.... For a public service announcement. I enjoy people food as much as the next dog, but there are some foods that Linda never gives me. The ASPCA receives over 130,000 calls a year from anxious owners calling about possible pet poisonings, mostly from human food and house stuff. Hear are a few of the foods in no particular order that are dangerous for us: Avocados; nuts; candy; beer; chocolate; caffeine; grapes & raisins. The real shocker for me was that onions are poisonous to pets. Licky (the black cat who used to be Chips buddy) loved pizza with onions and black olives. He would pooh-pooh the meats in favor of all the veggies. Some of the good foods we can eat are: Lean meats, fruits; some veggies; potatoes; plain bread; rice & pasta. Of course if you have a sensitive tummy, it would be a good idea to check with your vet. Bon Appitite!

Boogie-Woogie

I am a great dancer, and now there might be an opportunity for some formal training. There are new classes forming for "Freestyle" dog dancing lessons. Paws2Dance teaches moves like "weaves" and "back-ups". I would rock that place if I enrolled. Watch out Dancing with the Stars... here comes Choopie. Maybe I can get the Yo Quiero Taco Bell Chihuahua pup to be my "star" partner.

Success !!

After 5 attempts from 4 different men, 1 women and 1 Choopie helper, the towel bar is finally up in Linda's bathroom. Ta-Da!! Now lets see how long it stays up before it falls off the wall again. (Thanks Paul. Sorry if I chewed your finger off, it still tasted like the Chimichanga you had for lunch, and that's one of my favorite foods.)

YO MAMA....

...so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her. (Not!!)

Today is Mother's Day and I wanted to treat mom right. Since I am too little to reach the stove, I tried to get Snicker's to help me cook so we could treat Linda to breakfast in bed. He would not put the apron or chef hat on, even after I showed him a photo of another dog who enjoys cooking. I'm kind of mad at him for being selfish. She always cooks us yummy meals and treats. Instead I've been cuddling and kissing her to show my appreciation. Plus, as an added gift, I have not had one pp accident today. She really appreciates that, probably more then any pancakes or muffins that I would have cooked. The cat could care less. Chip barfed 2 times today. She had to get the SpotBot out and clean up both times. I love Linda so much that I play with her even if she is a vegan and would never tie a steak around her neck.